Thursday, January 17, 2008
When you leave work early Monday afternoon because you feel like you suddenly have sawdust stuck in your throat (but you promise you'll be back tomorrow).
When you make a nest on the couch because you know you won't have the strength to climb up and down your lofted bed three or more times in the middle of the night.
When tomorrow comes and the sawdust is still there and hey! Now there is a fever, too.
When you call in sick to work for the first time in your "adult" life (but you promise you'll be back tomorrow).
When you want to sleep in but you can't stop moving a single part of your body long enough to breathe straight.
When you can't watch your favorite sitcom because fits of laughter turn into fits of cough...ter.
When it takes all of your strength to stand up and peel an orange.
When your fever won't break.
When you can't speak at normal volumes.
When your fever still won't break.
When you finally sleep through the night.
When you wake up and find your fever STILL WON'T BREAK.
When you call in sick for the second time in your "adult" life (this time, no promises).
When you begin to fear the strep.
When you decide to walk a block to the family clinic.
When the family clinic is filled with rows of sick people watching Montel in a pink and green pastel waiting room that is in itself enough to make you sick.
When you don't have any cash so the lady says, "you can just pay me next time."
When you find out for the first time since you were five you have the flu.
When you're too tired to wait in line for the throat numbing prescription at the pharmacy.
When your sick of starving yourself so you order a pizza for $18 that you can hardly eat so your roommates have at it.
When not even watching Mr. Darcy for two hours makes you feel any better.
When you decided your fever WILL go away and you WILL sleep in your bed and you WILL go to work.
When you go to work (...with a slight fever).
When you make it through the day okay.
You walk home with no umbrella in freezing temperatures and a mixture of wind, rain, and snow beat you down and force you to walk fast against your sad immune system's will until finally you arrive in your apartment with your heart beating in your neck and your lungs as dry as a really, really dry place.
When you have to carry your laundry down the stairs and out the door in that same weather on that same night because if you don't do it tonight, you have no underwear tomorrow. And you don't want to go through that again...
When tomorrow is your 23rd birthday.
When you know you are going to feel sick on your 23rd birthday.......
....is when all you really need is your mom and your dad and your sister and your sister.
I can't wait to see you guys on Saturday. SCREW the FLU! Who's with me?
Posted by Brittany White at 8:41 PM
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Their names were Ludkhanna and Brunhilde Lienhardt. AKA number 24 and number 25 (at least that's what the Americans called them).
Please enjoy the following picture-story, beginning with the day they first boarded the USS Giganatee en route to New York City:
After eight months of living in 4x4 quarters with their own waste, Ludkhanna and Brunhilde finally caught glimpse of lady liberty.
Upon seeing Ellis Island, the girls could not wait to wait some more in a big room where they would hopefully be admitted into America.
Here is a special photo of a fellow immigrant. He was obviously in awe of what his future would hold. He was also cold.
After washing herself of her waste, the first place that Ludkhanna wanted to go was the famous Times Square.
Soon, the girls noticed they were ravished. They found solace in the German word, "wienerwurst," but they were more intrigued by the "Old Kentucky Whiskey".
[photos of Whiskey drinking not found]
But before we continue with the story, let us remember first where the cousins came from:
'Twas a dark, scary place. Where dinosaurs roamed the earth. Lundky tried to fend of the ferocious monster with a mysterious light that sometimes spoke at her and called her, "Ena".
Brunhilde, however, had no such mysterious light, and was forced to sing lullabies to the monster. The monster actually fell in love with her because he mistook her face for that of a fellow beast.
It was also severely cold in their home country.
Brunhilde skinned a 'coon to wear on her head to keep her warm and to make a fashion statement.
The girls missed their family from their home country. Here is Brunhilde in the last photo ever taken of her and the uncle that riased her, Edviener.
Ludkhannah had a much larger family. With 25 brothers and sisters, Ludky was the first to leave home.
Now, back to Ellis Island. Unfortunately, Brunhilde did not know how to write. Or hold a pencil. She is listed in the annals of Ellis Island history as: "~~~\/~ kumquat"
A young american on-looker could not believe her eyes.
Ludkhanna could write well and she laughed in Brunhilde's face shortly after this photo was taken.
Brunhilde was so excited to see the American Flag that she wanted to eat it.
Ludkhanna was still hunched over from the 4x4 living quarters.
Ludkhanna loved the underground tunnels so much, that she often danced around with the poles.
When the cousins realized they had only been eating flour and water for eight months, they decided to test the local fair. Brunhilde swallowed the triangluar meal in one bite.
Ludkhanna was mezmerized that a pig could be so small on a piece of bread.
The cousins realized their options for settling were limitless. Ludkhanna wanted to see Indian Territory. She heard they didn't wear underwear.
Ludkhanna could not believe the people were frolicking on a pond in front of an ice god.
The two cousins decided to board at the glowing pink mansion, Hotel Barbie. Ludkhanna lost her key and got trapped on the left side of the Barbie sign.
Ludkhanna also enjoyed shopping at a magical place called Chelsea Market.
The girls were having a WICKED awesome TIME, and even made friends with a DRAGON (Brunhilde refrained from singing lullabies).
In conclusion, America was a transforming place from this....
Henceforth, the girls are called "Paris" and "Brit Brit."
Posted by Brittany White at 11:43 PM