Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun duuun!

Friday and Saturday night we went to Lincoln Center. Friday was Jazz at Lincoln Center and out seats were basically on the stage. There is a row of seats that circle the back of the stage and that's where we sat and it was awesome. Last night we saw the New York Philharmonic. Seriously? I could get addicted. They played four pieces, including the overture. The second half was Beethoven's Symphony No. 5 (you know, dun dun dun DUUUUN, dun dun dun DUUUUN...) and it was basically breath taking. One of the pieces they did was about 15 minutes long and there was all kinds of dissonance and unresolve...it was all legato, no punchiness about it at all. It was more modern, written in the 20th century. And to hear all of this amazing music by some of the most amazing musicians in the world made me feel very, very blessed. It took me back to All State Choir. Not only the life changing performances (and I can say that now with the benefit of hindsight), but those darn auditions. Sitting in a chair in the back of an auditorium praying they don't call my name immediately but getting increasingly frightened as the approached the third chair, second chair, first chair...Some of the best moments of my life right there. I miss having a reason to hold someone's hand that tight. I feel a strong need to be in a choir. I think it is definitely something I will seek out after I graduate.

Here is a picture of the fountain that the major theaters of Lincoln Center surround:

Welp, see ya later.

Nice.

Remember the song that said “Live in New York but leave before it makes you hard. Live in LA but leave before it makes you soft.” I think that guy (the same guy that directed Romeo and Juliet and Moulin Rouge, actually) was telling the truth. I’ve realized that I am not always a nice person here. I believed in an assumption that no one was nice and I might as well not angry them by saying “hello” or even “excuse me” with an honest sound of apology in my voice. I saw a woman asking for change last night and I wanted to ignore her like I normally do. Then she saw a girl my age approaching her and she goes “Oh hi!” and the girl said in the most kind voice, “Hello. How was you’re day?” I heard her reply “Oh not so good,” as I was walking past.

A man just walked up to another man in Starbucks and played a few notes on his trumpet. Walking over I saw a man carrying two see-through bags full of human size doll heads. Honestly, where else?

...

I typed that up a few days ago. And I also changed my attitude a few days ago. I started smiling at people more. I have spoken more. I have been nice. I have not assumed that people do not like nice. I said "good morning" to a bored cashier at CVS and she smiled and we talked a little. I talked to people in elevators.

It's pretty simple, isn't it?

When doing nothing achieves everything...mmm.

I'm into day three of my fall break. Let me tell you how wonderfully uneventful it has been. Besides hanging out with friends at night, I've been totally lazy, just reading and writing. I could punch myself for not writing a song in months. I did try, though. I wrote lyrics and attempted to use Garage Band...wasn't the same. I asked the Lord for one song over these four days and He was faithful:

I haven’t really been what I always hoped I would be
I haven’t exactly turned out
With what I’d hoped the world would see
When I really found my voice
Would I really make the choice to speak

I haven’t always tried like I always dreamed that I would
I believed in lies so much more than I should
When I finally found my legs
Would I really have the strength to tread

How many times have they said,
Do you really have to be here?
Do you really want to be here?
Isn’t there somewhere else?

I’m not leaving quiet
I’m not leaving quiet
I’m not leaving quiet

When I walk alone I can feel the wind in my face
When I look into her eyes I can feel the pain she’s embraced
Even when I’ve lost my dreaming
I know I have not lost my feeling yet

How many times have I cried,
Do I really have to be here?
Do I really want to be here?
Isn’t there some place else?

I cannot go quiet
I cannot go quiet
I cannot go quiet

It's not the whole thing, but there's most of it. I like having my guitar back. But I can't wait to play some Christmas music on my piano. I am already in a Christmas mind set and I guess it's because of the cold. It's lingering in the 50's and that's the weather I'm used to around Christmas time, maybe a little colder. So...when it gets even colder I'm afraid my brain will scatter and freak out because I won't be able to associate the cold with anything besides snowboarding and that is clearly not an option in this place.

I can't believe no one else freaked out about David Moscow besides Carly, cause I told her about it personally. Seriously, it's Davey! I need to own that movie and the soundtrack.

Well I have very important things to do. Bye.