brittany, brooklyn

Year Twenty Five

2010-02-22T17:52:00.001-05:00

In case you check this graveyard of a blog regularly, please feel free to move on over to my DAILY updated blog, Year Twenty Five!

Brittany, Austin

2009-12-02T16:47:00.002-05:00

Coming soon!!!!!

Maybe.

But I AM moving to Austin. I can't deny my roots any longer.

Pioneer WOMAN!!!

2009-10-06T17:43:00.005-04:00

Okay, I must have exhausted every social network resource I can think of, but in case you didn't know, my photo is on Pioneer Woman's website today!!!! I feel so happy. Be sure to check out comment number 11. I didn't hire her. I don't even KNOW her! (But I do know comment number 69...thanks Alison!)

The call was to upload your favorite portrait. I uploaded a few, thinking I had no chance as there were already close to 6,000 uploaded. But I am a dreamer of dreams!! And it paid off!

This is Nzingo. She is one of four children of the host family that I lived with for the last two months. Grayson, my awesome roommate, brought ring pops and Nzingo never stopped licking that thing, I swear. In fact, morning day I stepped on a sticky ring and I thought I'd put it in the trash so was very confused when I saw Nzingo sucking on it a little while later. That's when I freaked out and ACTUALLY threw it in the trash. But she sure did love it.

Two of my favorite things colliding...Africa and Pioneer Woman. Oh, what a beautiful day!

Do you have some free time?

2009-09-22T12:45:00.001-04:00

Here it is. Every single picture I took while I was in Nairobi on one website PLUS bonus video! If you are bored and looking to pass the time, this is the way to go.

August in Nairobi

Have fun!

Number 64 SO HELP ME!

2009-09-19T22:19:00.004-04:00

One day, a long time ago, I fell in love with a band. I don't remember how it happened, but it was instant. Everyone in my family knew, but only a few close friends new. I felt a little ashamed. Oh boy, am I about to dish some secrets.

I have a large imagination and when I was younger I was in a completely different world most of the time. I felt like if I invited certain friends over and they saw the Hanson and Babysitters Club posters on my wall, they'd somehow be transported into the world that I imagined everyday and then I'd be a complete outcast from society.

Sooo...that's about the time the Internet was becoming accessible to me. I remember I used to run home from school before my parents get home, log on, and hit up all my favorite Hanson websites. Then I'd talk to the three friends I met in a Hanson fan Yahoo group (Amy, who I met eventually at a concert but lost touch with, Kelly, who was also a huge Jane Austen fan, who I also lost touch with, and Amber, who's real name turned out to be Mikkele, who is my facebook friend - hi Mikkele). Finally, ugh, I'm cringing...finally...finally....I would print off as many pictures as I could before I heard my parents come home. I used up so much ink and paper. I felt convicted of it often. Such a bad person. Such a terrible thing to hide. But I kept doing it. And I have proof. Two large bins of my...collection...are in the attic of our house.

Mom, please don't throw them away?

But aside from my crazy, this band had some good impacts on me. Thankfully, they were influenced by some great legendary artists that I found myself researching out of curiosity. Jackson 5, James Taylor, Chuck Berry, and so on. And then I started writing music. And I started writing stories, and drawing pictures. And over the years I realized that music was where my life was headed. It was the one thing I never grew tired of. So now, twelve years later, I'm still a Hanson fan. And I really think their music helped put me on a path that has lead to me being here in New York, working in the music business.

So imagine how I felt when I got a call on a Friday afternoon - that I almost didn't even answer because we were about to close up - from Hanson's lawyer, saying that Hanson was going to come in for a meeting with my boss the following week.

Well I spent the next few days hyperventilating a little bit, just to get it out. Celebrities really don't make me nervous anymore but COME ON!!!!!!! I had to do my best to suppress every little thought that went through my head between the ages of twelve and ~~twenty three~~ sixteen years old. I had to keep my composure. I had to not throw up, which was definitely what I felt like I was going to do.

They came in and my boss told me to go out and greet them. So I did. I shook their hands and introduced myself, like a good executive assistant, and then I lost it. I started crying. Whimpering, even. I grabbed the closest brother to me and held on for dear life because for goodness sake THIS WAS MY CHANCE!!!!

Good story, right?

Alright, I lied. All I said was, "It's so nice to meet you, I'm a huge fan." And then it was like I mattered, and they looked interested and genuinely thankful and Isaac laughed and said, "Well you have terrible taste in music, but thanks!" And then he asked where the bathroom was. I make such an impression.

And then I shook hand with their dad. And then Taylor went directly to the piano and got in a zone and started playing. And then I just kind of stood around and watched and tried to be normal, then realized I was looking like a freak, so I went back to my desk. Then they followed me and went into my boss's office and I tried to pay attention to what was going on with my emails. Then they moved around the corner and played some new music that they brought in and I was dying to go in there and swipe it away, it was so good.

I did go in there, though, at my boss's request. I went to offer them water bottles. And this is where I really did feel like a FREAK as I stood in the middle of the room and offered water to a bunch of confused looking faces, which I didn't understand, until I saw that everyone was already holding water bottles. And then I did the Linus walk back to my desk.

They left two hours later. I was happy. And I crossed something huge off my list. There are a lot more details, but I'll spare you. I have a lot more insight into what this means, but I'll spare you that, also.

They look like this now. Don't say I didn't tell you so:

And they are all married. The oldest has two kids, the youngest has one kid, and the middle:

By the way, want to know why I'm still such a huge fan? Because of their passion for Africa. What they are doing to raise awareness inspires me. And it makes me wonder what I can do to share with the world the impact that Africa has had on my life.

But more about that later.

Check, check!

2009-09-16T21:17:00.017-04:00

Sometimes I think about my list and I feel a little discouraged. Mostly because I know I've already failed on a few things liiiiike send Lauren and Rachel a post card every month. And a few other monthly/daily things that I definitely am uh, not doing.

But I decided to go ahead and give that list another gander today BECAUSE...one of the things that I thought would most definitely not happen, or at least be really hard to accomplish...happened. Last Friday.

And so I started scrolling down that list and you know what? I forgot about a lot of things. And I DID a lot of those things. I guess it's all apart of my adventurous spirit that I subconsciously...remembered? Yep, that's it.

So let's catch up, shall we?

Number 12
Bring baked goods to work at least once every three months
One of the first things I made from that list down there was Pioneer Woman's cinnamon rolls. I cut the recipe in half and still had three pans, so I gave one away and brought one to work.

Number 18
Become a member of City Church
Did it! When Lauren was visiting in July, actually. I'm so blessed to be a part of City Church.

Number 34
Cook a meal for a family in my church
Well, I think this counts. I pretty much eat and cook at least once a week with the Gillens. This particular picture is from when Lauren was here and we made pizza. I really love eating and cooking with the Gillens!

Number 38
Eat and/or drink on the roof
Yep. Did that a lot this summer.

Number 41
Go apple picking
I did this! Two days ago! And I just made some Pioneer Woman apple cake with 'em.

Number 44
Go on a road trip
That came with the apple picking. We went to Poughkeepsie. I took lots of pictures!

Number 45
Go to a beach other than the one on Coney Island
In July Lauren, Claire and I went to Long Beach where we got more than we bargained for. Topless beaches? In New York? Did anyone know that? Did we participate? Did I take pictures? Am I still talking?

Number 46
Go to a concert in the park
Philharmonic in Prospect Park. Check!

Number 48
Go to a spa
Okay, uh, sorta did this. In Kenya. Went in for a massage and a manicure and I don't know...pretty sure I don't like massages from strangers. Just wanted to giggle the whole time. And also, we went to the wrong spa. It was about as big as my living room. Anyway, don't think I need to do it again.

Number 49
Go to a vineyard
There was a small winery at the orchard this weekend! I tried Macintosh, Blueberry, Peach, Blackberry, and some amazing tasting fall flavored wine. I'd like to go back. Really would.

Number 50
Go to Africa
Yeah. I will hopefully be sharing more about this soon, but click on the photo up there on the right (the one of me with a baby I ~~stole~~ met) for a quick run through!

Number 59
Host a BBC party (Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre)
This is not for the faint of heart.

Number 68
Picnic in the park
This has happened many glorious times so far.

Number 69
Plant an herb garden
This might be toeing the line, but I'm going to count it. A few months ago I bought a little basil plant from Ikea. All I had to do was spread the seeds, add water, and place on my window sill. I did that and my little basil plant grew beautifully! We even used some to put on that previously mentioned homemade pizza. I forgot, however, to ask my roommates to water it while I was in Africa for a month. I thought they might do it anyway. And even if they didn't, basil doesn't require a lot of water. Well, they didn't. It's okay, I don't blame them. I blame myself. Basil killer! Basil killer!

Might try that one again.

Number 72
Pray with a stranger
Thank you, Africa, for this. I prayed with many new brothers and sisters. Strangers no more.

Number 95
Take a homeless person to lunch and ask to pray for them
In the same vein as number 72. This is literally what we did one day in Africa. Brought them lunch, asked to pray for them. Most of them were high on glue and/or drunk. It was really hard, but it wasn't apart from God's reach. And can I just say that my little sister, Rachel, is super anointed? You should hear her pray. Ask her to pray for you someday. Please! You'll be blessed. Actually, thinking I need to take my own advice here. Rachel...?

There is one more that I didn't mention. The one that prompted this whole post in the first place. But seeing as it took me over two episodes of Glee to type this up, I'm going to wait on The Big One. The one that truly could not have happened outside of the Lord's intricate weaving. I mean, you're going to laugh when you find out what it is (if you haven't already narrowed it down), but I don't care. I'm over the moon, in fact!

But that story is for a later day. Until then, I'm off to comp-template how in the world I'm going to get Lauren to read a Harry Potter book.

So busy.

2009-09-02T13:52:00.004-04:00

Since I got back from Africa Saturday, I've been super busy. It's insane! I'm so freakin' busy!! Ahh!!

Just look at my TO DO list:

Cinnamon Rolls
Onion Strings (I have a new-found love for onions)
Baked Beans
Chocolate Gravy and Biscuits
Pumpkin Muffins
Apple Crisp
Pork Dumplings
Chicken Enchilada's

I have to make up for my First American Dinner of Velveeta Mac 'n Cheese and 7-11 brand peanut butter sandwich cookies. That meal needs to be completely erased from memory.

Jambo

2009-07-31T14:52:00.002-04:00

Hey out there...

I'm wrapping things up at work. Training the temp, archiving e-mails, finishing off my jar of dark chocolate peanut butter (very important). I won't be back here until September 1.

Isn't it funny how time passes? Or maybe not. I've been obsessed with this thought of time recently. How much it is to me and how little it is to God. I wait around for it to pass - or I hope that it stretches. My life is so linear. So "if" and "then". Can I even imagine a God unbridled by time and space?

Anyway, enough time has indeed passed that The Weekend is finally here. Back to Africa for a month. And I'm already thinking about how quickly time will pass while I'm there. It's a messy situation I put myself in, I tell ya.

I don't know what else to say besides

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ms. White

2009-06-02T11:18:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I was carrying groceries home after work and when I turned down my street, I noticed a little guy walking beside me. A cute little squirrel-guy.

I watched him hop around beside me, jumping from porch to porch, dodging trash cans, squeezing through iron rod fences and skipping steps.

I figured he was pretty unaware that I was there, but he still stayed next to me the whole walk down 14th Street. Until he hit a road block. A wall of trash cans and bricks that looked pretty impossible to breach, even for a squirrelly squirrel.

It made me a little sad, as I had formed the idea that he actually was walking with me. But I persevered. I walked up my steps and put my bags down inside the doorway while I searched for my keys in my bag.

Then I turned around to pick my bags back up and glanced towards our porch and what do you know. There he is, the little guy. Sitting on my porch starring at me. I looked at him for awhile and wondered if I should offer him some lettuce and sing him a song but he scampered off before I could bribe him with food (and arias).

It might freak you out a little, but I'm okay with it. Reminds me of another rodent-magnet I know.

SUGAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-05-06T15:44:00.005-04:00

A few short weeks ago I helped host a lingerie shower for my roommate, Alison. She's getting married and we needed to celebrate.

I decided to make some cupcakes. Then I got all these ideas. Then I looked at blogs and then I looked at pictures and then I combined other people's brilliant ideas and set off to create something marvelous for Alison.

I decided that fondant is not the devil.

It was fun, like Pioneer Woman told me it would be.

And everyone ate it! Because it tasted not only edible, but good-edible!

Here's the full set. This was fun.

I like baking more and more these days.

And for once in my life, I got paid for it. Mostly covered my expenses, but I got paid to make this cake with four friends from church who spent a long, long afternoon at my apartment then drove me to work with these four extremely heavy-probably-because-they-have-seven-total-pounds-of-butter cakes that thoroughly wore me out so much that I had to take the next day off work after they served their purpose at my co-worker's baby shower. Truly. was. exhausting. But...oh so pretty. I'm considering a little business on the side after that grueling weekend, because I actually really liked it. I've thought of calling it "The Red Apron" after the first apron I ever had which Rachel bought for me, or "Sweet Talk" after some cool graffiti I saw in Brooklyn. What do you think?

Those church friends also helped me create one last sweet thang. I will never EVER look at tootsie rolls the same way. But imagine the faces when this kitty litter cake showed up at the church pot luck.

Now. I'm off to contemplate the next creation...

In Progress

2009-04-20T13:00:00.003-04:00

How many people have learned this lesson before me? And how many times did they have to learn it? And how many times do I have to learn it?

This is why I like grace. Grace doesn't laugh at me when I mess up in the same way that I have messed up numerous times before.

I've noticed that I like to think about things that I can't control and then proceed to worry about them. I also like to use other words for worry like "ponder" or "think about things I can't control," because I know God tells us not to worry (Matthew 6:25 - "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life..." Matthew 6:27 - "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?")
but what I really mean by these semi-synonyms is "FREAKING OUT AND WORRYING". Did you like that sentence I just wrote? I'm worried it's very grammatically incorrect. AHHH!

I really have convinced myself that I'm not a worrier. But it hit me today on the subway that if I let these things control my thoughts, I am certainly a worrier. I try to plan, try to guess, and constantly wonder. But not in an imaginative way. In a FREAKING OUT way.

Anyway, I was reading about King David. His story is enough to hold my attention and wonder (in a good way) about who he was and how God used him. For about 12.5 seconds I got so immersed in King David that I forgot about my worried life and felt REALLY EXCITED ABOUT GOD. It was the best feeling of my day so far. I decided it was a really good feeling. And then I decided I wanted to just go ahead and keep feeling that way. Because it was so nice to let God have my worries for 12.5 seconds. But the worry crept up again, and that's when I entered the struggle between lies and truth. Oh boy.

The good news is God is stronger than me and God is Awesome when I am not. And...his strength is made perfect in my weakness! So I will rejoice in my weakness! So if I'm worried that I won't be able to stop worrying, that's okay, because I don't have to exhaust my own resources that will ultimately not even last a thirteenth of 12.5 seconds. I get to ask God for help, and because He is perfect and He loves me, He will help me. I love that about Him.

The best thing about not worrying this morning? I got to focus entirely on what was in front of me, without my thoughts wandering. And what was in front of me was a fresh cup of pumpkin spice coffee. And it was heavenly.

Disaster.

2009-04-11T11:47:00.004-04:00

I decided I would make sugar cookies for Easter. I have an awesome recipe that requires time and skill, but really pays off in the end. The cookies keep their shape and the frosting is perfection, as documented in the photo of my boss's holiday gift:

So I thought I'd make some Easter egg shapes. I even bought some edible markers to decorate with.

I failed in the following ways:

Placed them too close together. They are now very misshapen eggs.
I stacked them overnight. They stuck together.
So I warmed them up a bit to loosen them. Now they are crumby on top.
I lost about 5 in the process.
I dropped the final batch on the floor.
I'm now down to 15 ugly cookies.
I'm eating the broken pieces.
I feel sick.

Now I'm trying to decide if I want to try to salvage them with icing. Normally, icing is when I fail the most, so I'm afraid if I try to ice these suckers, I'll end up a big sticky mess on the floor, bawling as I lick the spoon clean.

It doesn't help that I just watched the incredible season finale of Friday Night Lights, so I'm a little emotional at the moment.

So, sugar cookies? You win. I cannot dominate you. But I can devour you. So I win. TAKE THAT YOU CRUMBY DISASTERS!

Pop Candy!

2009-04-07T12:48:00.003-04:00

One of my favorite blogs has featured me as the Reader of the Day!! CHECK IT OUT!

Lauren.

2009-04-06T20:45:00.013-04:00

I guess everyone knows my sisters and I like to pick on each other. Or I like to pick on them. Or Rachel and I like to pick on Lauren. To be specific.

Well. The thing is, it is one way that we love each other. I jump on Lauren in the morning and laugh at her while she rolls around groaning for 10 minutes until mom yells at me to leave her alone. It's fun (for me) and I honestly only remember one time where she really, truly got mad at us for picking on her and that was when Rachel and I poured water in her ear to wake her up while she fell asleep writing in her journal in Africa. Wups.

But on the other side, we really have no trouble expressing our love for each other. We can say "I love you" or "I miss you" or whatever else potentially-cliche phrase there is, and mean it every time. Never does it teeter towards the empty words that the world has shaped them to become.

You might not know that. And that is why I'm telling you. Not that it's important for you to hear it, it's just important to me to say it.

Lauren and Rachel are what I call built-in-best-friends. Above all other titles besides Daughter of Christ, Sister is the one I pride most. I cannot convey the gratitude I have to the Lord for creating me to be the Big Sister. I am so thankful that He has imparted in me even a tiny bit of the Love that He has for them. His tiny is my huge.

Lauren is really going through a difficult season right now, and I don't think she'll mind me telling you. In fact, my main goal here is to ask you to pray for her, however you feel led. Anyway, I've been thinking lately not only of how much I love her, but why I love her. And I thought I'd share that with you visually.

Here we are at one of Rachel's volleyball games on Lauren's birthday. I made her wear this ridiculous shirt. And then...

I made her pose on the court. She's trying to make an awkward face...and she succeeds.
Lauren likes to have fun. She is fun incarnate. You can't not have fun with Lauren. To me, and awkward face in a homemade T-shirt on a volleyball court while everyone is starring at you...is fun. Thanks for having fun with me.

Lauren is so amazingly quirky. She scares really easy and she freaks out when you tickle her (I do too, but more on that later). This is one of her strangest quirks. She hates silverware. The sound it makes on the plates literally makes her cringe and shake a little bit. So she uses these plastic forks. She's unique. She's okay with it.

She's funny and she likes laughing. Lauren makes me feel like I am the funniest person on the planet. The only time I couldn't make her laugh was when Rachel and I poured water in her ear to wake her up...that was when I knew she was upset. But here she is being funny, mimicking mom while dad is driving. You don't have to see it to believe it - just look at Rachel's face. Lauren's funny.

She makes this face. I LOVE THIS FACE. This face says, "I probably shouldn't have done that..." (in this example, "that" is pretending to have a broken arm right after Rachel actually broke hers) "...but it's pretty funny anyway, right?" This face cracks me up and almost immediately makes me say, "Lauren!" in a "I'm slightly reprimanding you-but-am-still-happy-you-did-it" way.

Also this face. This is the tickling face. I know sometimes I shouldn't like this face, but I can't help it. How can you resist tickling when she makes this face?

And this face?

And okay. Sometimes I joke with her about her boy-like features as a child. Clearly, I am just jealous because look at her. Seriously, look at HER. She's adorable.

And this one.

Please take time to consider yourself incredibly blessed right now because you are looking at the most beautiful picture ever taken. This is it. THIS is pure beauty. I love this picture. And maybe that's because I love the person in it. But it's also this picture. She's something between exquisite and perfect.

That's not all, but I think it will do for now. Feel free to discuss Lauren in the comments because clearly, I have not said it all. Love you, sis.

Number 92:

2009-04-02T09:28:00.007-04:00

"Successfully play a really awesome April Fool's day prank"

If you remember from the list, I let Lauren make up the last ten. Number 92 was her suggestion and now I need you to tell me if these pranks qualify as "really awesome".

I woke up yesterday with an idea to prank my co-worker:

And:

He loved it. The phone wouldn't pick up and the mouse wouldn't work. He spent a few minutes fumbling with the cords behind the computer before I told him to just turn the mouse over. We decided to play the same pranks on my boss...success. They tried to get me back by hiding my phone, but turns out I don't mind if my phone is gone because then I don't have to answer it.

But I wasn't quite satisfied. I really truly wanted to get Lauren, but figured it was useless and she would see it coming.

Until I remembered facebook.

And then I remembered her password.

Actually, I didn't, but I took a guess and got it right on the first try. It was a sign!!

I proceeded to change her picture and her status and laughed hysterically to myself for about 30 minutes before I felt kinda bad and texted her some clues:

B: Happy April Fool's day!!
L: You too! Are you going to do anything?
B: Yes. I already did. (I'm so ominous)
L: What did you do!
B: Check your mail.
L: Email or mail?
B: Email
L: I don't have an email from you on any 3 of my accounts. (3 accounts? Who does she think she is?)
B: Keep digging. The email isn't from me exactly...
L: Does it have anything to do with me needing to poop. You jerk.

So Lauren quickly changed her picture and status update.

But the thing is...

I knew that was coming....

So I took a screen shot for safe keeping...

Because I had to prove that this prank was "really awesome"...

And now, here it is for the world to see. Feel free to click on it and enlarge for the best viewing:

And now all of you know that deep down inside, I am an 11-year-old boy who thinks immature jokes are REALLY AWESOME. Lauren has to poop HAHAHAHAHAHA!

So anyway. Lauren asked me if I hacked Rachel. I didn't see any point in hacking Rachel because I couldn't think of anything I could do to her that she wouldn't do herself, frankly.

Case in point:

BONUS: I fooled Monica and her fam. Nice!

Thing is, Rachel decided to keep the picture. She really does have an all star butt. Also, we talked on the phone for 20 minutes or so last night and this event never even came up. We're cool like that, me and Rach. She totally rolls with the punches.

That's why I pick on the middle child and not the youngest child. Rachel has some sort of older-sister-deflector-shield.

SO! You tell me. "Really awesome" or do I have to try again next year?

Number...?

2009-03-30T12:45:00.004-04:00

In the first draft of my list, one of my goals was to see live music at least once a month. I don't remember deleting, but apparently I did. But I forgot! I've been working on fulfilling that goal even though its deleted. Oh well.

Point is, it's easy for me to see live music a lot because it is (or it should be) part of my job, and because I know some good musicians. Caleb Hawley is one of them. He's Samantha's husband and Samantha was my best friend at Belmont and I love her.

Here he is playing his HUGE HIT, "Selling Out" - I think you'll like it! I love the shout out to Texas.

Is this okay?

2009-03-26T11:16:00.001-04:00

I saw a woman breastfeeding on the subway yesterday.

Lightbulb o' the Day

2009-03-25T11:40:00.003-04:00

I certainly don't have a great idea as to why I'm here, but every once in awhile I gain a little illumination as to what I'm not here for. And folks, I'm here to tell you that I am NOT here to print and/or gather documents...put labels on them...put them in a folder...and put that folder in a filing cabinet.

Another successful day of knowing what my calling is not.

Number 26

2009-03-22T20:09:00.003-04:00

I crossed the first thing off my list by purchasing and using these:

I figured if I'm going to skate around New York City I should have something better than the last pair I bought at WalMart. Those wheels hardly even moved and I learned my lesson trying to maneuver the hills in Nashville on them.

So I went to Modell's during my lunch break last Wednesday. There was only one pair in my size but they seemed perfect. Only they were up on a shelf. I could reach them, but didn't want to risk knocking down the boxes resting on top of my pair.

I noticed a handy ladder nearby but figured that was an employees only thing. So I went in search of an employee. I found a lady who was incredibly focused on putting a pair of pants on a hanger. I asked her if someone could help me, assuming she'd call the appropriate person. She acknowledged the fact that I was there, finished her hanger duties, then walked over to the roller blade wall herself. Where she asked me what pair I wanted. So I pointed. So she reached up to grab them. Did I mention that she was significantly shorter than me? So I kind of stared on, a little perplexed, knowing full well what was about to happen.

And it did happen. She started pulling the box out. The boxes on top started to topple a little. And then they started to topple a lot. So she DROPPED the box of skates that she had originally intended to get, hoping to stop the topple...I don't know. Meanwhile, I figure that hanger lady doesn't deserve this, so I reach in because I am talented in height, and attempt to stop the boxes from falling, somehow gashing my knuckle open along the way.

I don't think she noticed that, but I could still tell she felt bad by the kind way she pointed me towards a bench that I could use to try them on.

Okay, fast forward. I bought them and decided to skate to care group that night. HAHAHAHAHAHA is what you might have been doing if you saw me. Sweet little me, assuming I could skate in the bike lane at 7PM on a week day down a busy two way street!

Well, I did it, mister. And it was fairly exhilarating. I even convinced myself for a few moments that I was a daredevil! Alas, I don't want to be a stupid daredevil (though really, most daredevils are infused with a little stupid), so I'm hoping to buy the safety set soon. Protect me bones and me head. Then I'm going to whiz through the awesome trails in Prospect Park and have leg muscles like you've never seen unless you've seen my sister, Lauren, while she was a gymnast or my sister, Rachel, while she was a volleyball star. Dem were some big muscles.

Seems I'm veering off into the place where I think in different accents every other sentence. I won't make you bear with me on that one. So I'm off to work on some music...and brainstorm which number to cross off next. I'm super excited for number 50.

I see dead ends.

2009-03-18T16:42:00.005-04:00

I got a haircut last November at this cute little place that a friend of mine from church owns. It was a great haircut.

I think I need to go back.

Because this is what I do. I sit at work. On the train. On the couch. At church. Wherever. And I pull my split ends. I find an odd sense of exhilaration from it. I love it. I am addicted to it?

I get upset when people walk by my desk right when I've found a particularly good one, but I can't be found out. So I drop it. With all those strands of hair, you think I'll ever find it again? UGH!

I have realized how bad I am. So I decided to take a tip I read in Real Simple Magazine and trim off the ends. I didn't want to upset my long, luscious layers, so I just trimmed the bottom layer straight across. It helped...for a little bit. But now I'm searching through the layers for those precious little Easter eggs. It's a problem.

So I figured I'd get a haircut! But naw...I decided to allocate that money towards crossing something off my list in a moment of spontaneity earlier today. But maybe, subconsciously, I'm trying to prolong the moment that me and my split ends...split.

Am I alone in this obsession?!

BMS: Gorgonzola Basil Chicken Burgers and Sweet Potato Fries

2009-03-14T21:09:00.007-04:00

I made this for my roommate, Kate, Saturday night. She said it was her favorite thing I've made and added the colorful grapes to our plate. While my contribution to the meal was a little bit more elaborate, don't you go assuming I spent lots of money and time on it. That's not my style. So let's start with the burgers.

1 lb ground chicken (these had a 50/50 chance of being turkey burgers, but the chicken was on sale - you could use red meat too, of course)

1 4oz. package crumbled gorgonzola cheese

bunch of fresh basil

minced garlic (1 tbsp or so?)

Easy. First I washed the basil and chopped it up. I used 1/4 to 1/2 cup. Then mix the basil into the chicken with the garlic, and whatever spices you like. I used some Lowery's, pepper, and a few sprinkles of Worcestershire Sauce.

Mix all that.

Then separate into 8 thin patties.

Then place 1 oz (or whatever you can fit) of the cheese on top of 4 of the patties.

Then place the remaining 4 patties on top of the cheese-topped ones. Pinch the sides together to keep the cheese in.

Now. I live in a teensy Brooklyn apartment and don't have a grill. But I do have...a George Foreman :) And it works nicely. I cooked two burgers at time until the cheese oozed out and they just started to char.

Bonus: the cheese turns crispy on the outside where it oozes. It. is. incredible.

Since we're trying to be healthy, here, I toasted one side of some sandwich thins and topped them with some extra cheese, a bit a barbecue sauce (I love barbecue sauce), and good old green leaf lettuce.

YES.

Now for the sweet potato fries.

I make these a lot. They are good. I've done quite a bit of experimenting to get them just right and believe I have found it. The perfect combination for the perfect baked sweet potato fries.

First, pre-heat the oven to 450.

Then scrub and slice the potatoes. I normally cut them in quarters and then go from there. I try to keep them about a quarter inch thick.

Then throw them in a bowl and toss with:

olive oil (a little goes a long way here - I used 1 tsp. for 1 large potato)

cumin powder

ground nutmeg

I sort of eye ball the spices. I'd say 1/2-1 tsp of each.

Can you believe all those things taste good together? They DO!

Pop them in the oven and mix/flip over after 15 minutes. Depending on how many you're making, you may need another 15 minutes. In my case, I only left them in for 10 more. They were soft in the middle and crispy on the ends.

They taste good with barbecue sauce. I love barbecue sauce.

Happy meals make happy roommates!

File under: Next time I run out of underwear.

2009-03-12T13:56:00.003-04:00

Yesterday between work and church I had a little time to kill.

I went to Target in Brooklyn and spotted a long dress that I thought might be a nice contender for my Africa wardrobe. Oh, hi. I'm going Africa in August! You can't show your knees there. Anyway, cute, long dress...let's try it on.

It looks pretty good on me...if I were pregnant.

No thanks, let me just put my jeans back...oh, what's this?

It's clothing tags that have been ripped off.

That's strange. I wonder what they were for...

Oh. Thongs.

Oh. Someone is walking around Target. Wearing two stolen thongs under their clothes.

Huh.

That is weird and gross and...

I kinda gotta give them credit?

Thong thief, you are pretty brill.

BMS: Roasted Veggies and Chocolate Caramel Popcorn

2009-03-10T10:55:00.005-04:00

I have an idea. I'm thinking of combining my blogs instead of trying to keep up with the two. I'd like to make BMS (and yes, I did just google "BMS" to make sure it didn't stand for anything embarrassing) more of a feature for now since I haven't had much time to cook interesting things lately. Here goes.

Roasted veggies!

I mixed these yummy things (broccoli, carrots, asparagus, garlic, onions) with some dry white wine, balsamic vinegar, olive oil, and herbs. Put 'em in the oven for about 30 minutes at 450 and they turned into this:

I like asparagus. They are like green french fries. Uhh. The broccoli really soaked up the mixture nicely, maybe next time I will close up the foil to let the flavors get stronger. I just like that charred stuff that I hear is a cancer causing agent. Oh well. The vitamins in the vegetables will cancel it out!

And just for fun...

I made this caramel popcorn (took the advice of reviewers and cut butter from one stick to half a stick - believe me, you won't notice) with some chocolate drizzle a few weeks ago. DO IT!

bedroom, brooklyn

2009-03-10T10:14:00.009-04:00

My new room is pretty and warm and homey. And it's all mine. And I love it. Have a gander:

Somewhere below is the "Forget" box. Bills, taxes, insurance...all necessary, but I prefer the "Remember" box. The one with the ticket stubs and the photos and the playbills.

I forgot to take the water bottle off the shelf. It is not a staple in my room (but it is a staple on my work desk).

I got this at IKEA for about $6. Notice any familiar faces?

The beautiful view from the doorway. I didn't show you the side with the huge paper lantern, vanity mirror, and the necklace holder Lauren made me for Christmas. You'll just have to visit me to see that.

This is Ezra. Ezra says hello.

Sometimes Ezra gets lonely when I'm gone at work or galavanting through the city.

But Toby is always there with a shoulder to lean on.

Well maybe I shouldn't be left all alone in a room after all. Here's hoping that one day I get more creative with those instruments than I do with my BFF stuffed animals.

And then there were three...!

2009-03-06T11:32:00.004-05:00

So I've come to realize that list down there is a bit daunting. Yikes.

Two things I'm doing good at: my progress in reading the Bible in a year (I am zipping through Numbers!) and memorizing verses. This week I'm focusing on a verse we may have heard many times and one that our pastor, Zac, used as a cornerstone in his message last Sunday:

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives you life has set you free from the law of sin and death." Romans 8:1-2

This verse is such and important basis for my Christian life and one that I should always, always have in my heart. I'm excited to accumulate all this good stuff. At the end of 1001 days I suspect I'll have 100 post-its with my memory verses stuffed in a journal somewhere. I've got it here on computer screen at work and once I buy a new mirror for my new room tomorrow, I'll put them there, too.

That's right! New room! As of tomorrow I'll have occupied every room in my perfect little apartment. Today, my wonderful (and sadly temporary) roommate is flying off to Scotland to get married where she spent her first 13 years. She was only with us about five months, but she was a super roommate and I loved sharing a room with her.

So now it's just me, Alison, and Kate. And we're keeping it that way. We are moving on up, folks! Three people in a three bedroom apartment...it's the way things were meant to be. I'm moving because Kate has a greater need for the big room than I do, but I'm excited for the change.

And I am celebrating tomorrow by spending my morning in the heaven that is IKEA. It's just a 10 minute free bus ride from me, so I'll be there when the doors open to try to beat the Brooklyn crowds.

Per the usual, I'll probably post photos of my new digs eventually. Until then...peace out.

Snow Day

2009-03-02T17:34:00.004-05:00

I spent the day in Prospect Park taking photos. Take a look here!

The list.

2009-02-26T17:07:00.009-05:00

The Mission:
Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:
Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Okay y'all, here we go. I love this idea and am really excited. I've decided to start on March 1 so that Lauren has enough time to write her own list and join me. That means I've got to finish by November 27, 2011.

MY LIST:

Itatlics: I am in the process of completing.

1. Save all my change for 1001 days
2. Memorize 100 Bible verses
3. Choose one family member to focus my prayers on each week.
4. Thank God before every meal
5. Document one thing I am thankful for every day for a year
6. Play an instrument once a week
7. Mail Lauren and Rachel handwritten letters/postcards once a month
8. Volunteer/help once a month
9. Update my food blog at least once a month
10. Limit my Starbucks purchases to once a month
11. Build my library by purchasing one cheap book at Strand per month
12. Bring baked goods to work at least once every three months
13. Blog every day for a month
14. Take one picture a day for a month
15. Decide on a new strength work out and do it for a month (at least)
16. Purchase all my produce from the local farmers at the street markets for one month
17. Be a live studio audience member
18. ~~Become a member of City Church~~
19. Bike through a park in the City
20. Build my own headboard
21. Buy a copy of Disney's Snow White
22. Buy a dress at Anthropologie
23. Buy a new pair of Chuck Taylors
24. Buy flowers for no particular reason
25. Buy gifts from Etsy
26. ~~Buy roller blades and use them~~
27. Buy/acquire a Kitchen Aid mixer
28. Buy a small grill and learn how to barbecue
29. Color through an entire coloring book
30. Continue to pay towards my credit card and school loans
31. Convince Lauren to read at least one Harry Potter book
32. Convince one or both of my sisters to live with me again
33. Cook a 5 course meal
34. ~~Cook a meal for a family in my church~~
35. Create a "recipe repertoire"
36. Create and mail Christmas cards
37. Don’t eat fast food (with the exception of one visit to both sonic and Chick-fil-a when I go home)
38. ~~Eat and/or drink on the roof~~
39. Fly a kite
40. Go a week without washing my hair
41. ~~Go apple picking~~
42. Go fishing
43. Go on a hike
44. ~~Go on a road trip~~
45. ~~Go to a beach other than the one on Coney Island~~
46. ~~Go to a concert in the park~~
47. Go to a park and swing
48. ~~Go to a spa~~
49. ~~Go to a vineyard~~
50. ~~Go to Africa~~
51. Go to DC
52. Go to Manhattan and back without using public transportation
53. Go to Niagara Falls
54. Go to the Brooklyn museum
55. Go to the Coney Island aquarium
56. Go to the diner down the street somewhere around 3AM
57. Go to the West Coast
58. Help a stranger
59. ~~Host a BBC party (Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre)~~
60. Keep a scrapbook
61. Learn French
62. Learn how to play the drums
63. Learn to play tennis
64.~~Meet Hanson~~
65. Memorize a classical piece on the piano
66. Never complain
67. Paint on a canvas
68. ~~Picnic in the park~~
69. ~~Plant an herb garden~~
70. Play an open mic
71. Play in the rain
72. ~~Pray with a stranger~~
73. Read 30 books
74. Read a comic book
75. Read the Bible in a year
76. Ride a horse
77. Run 3 5ks
78. See at least 3 Broadway shows
79. See the Nutcracker
80. See a movie openings at midnight
81. Send a letter to Brandon
82. Sew a dress
83. Sew a quilt
84. Spend an entire day watching Harry Potter
85. Spend an entire day watching The Lord of the Rings
86. Start and keep a dream journal
87. Update my resume
88. Watch the sunrise from the Brooklyn Bridge
89. Wear a costume
90. Write a book (children's or otherwise)
91. Write a song inspired by/for my parents and sisters (one for each)

For the last 10, I was stumped. So I let Lauren write them. OH BOY:

92. ~~Successfully play a really awesome April fool’s day prank~~
93. Give/Receive 8 big bear hugs throughout the day just see if you are a happier person.
94. Buy an animal
95. ~~Take a homeless person to lunch and ask to pray for them (Choose wisely)~~
96. Go a full day without picking your wedgie, no matter how far up there it is.
97. Visit Stillwater, and go to a football game
98. Wear all pink one day (A pink dress doesn't count)
99. Fart in public. And not a silent one, and not around a bunch of girlfriends
100. Sing out loud on the subway until someone gives you money
101. Skip everywhere you go for a day

What do you think? Anything seem impossible? I hope so :)

Coming Soon.

2009-02-25T11:52:00.000-05:00

MY LIST!

Food and Folk

2009-02-20T22:47:00.009-05:00

Well I was hoping to post a nice picture of my legs and say something like, "I went to Vermont and all I got were these busted up knees," but somehow every picture I took looked simultaneously better and worse than I wanted to. Better because my bruises are looking less black and blue. Worse because...I mean come on, what kind of idiot posts a picture of her legs on the internet in the middle of winter? Not this idiot!

So instead, I'll post some pictures of my dinner. I know - I have a separate blog for food. HA! Last time I updated that baby was April, so just deal with me here and check out this sweet meal:

Broccoli, spinach and feta pizza on homemade whole wheat and honey crust

I made the crust personal size and baked 4 extra for later on. They are awesome and super easy!

So, Vermont. I went and fulfilled my dream of visiting "America's winter play land" (you may or may not know that White Christmas is basically my favorite movie ever). It didn't exactly live up to Rosemary Clooney expectations, but I had a good time. I snowboarded for the first time in 6 years and I hurt very much because of it. Apparently they have to make fake snow on the East coast - no nice, soft powder to fall on like Colorado so generously supplies. I really did have some bad looking knees and almost called someone to drive me down on the last run...but I soldiered through. I actually am a good snow boarder. I think. I have lots of excuses and conditions to blame the soreness and bruising on. But like I said to my housemates...I love battle wounds! Means you experienced something. I really am all for living.

Speaking of living, lately I find I'm between this feeling of wanting to be busy and distracted and wanting to hole up all alone somewhere and refresh. I can't decide which sounds better.

Last night I saw a concert at the Apollo in Harlem: M. Ward. He was incredible. His voice is so smooth and warm and I felt like I was sitting by a fire. He is also a great guitar player. All those songs on his site are good, but "Never Had Nobody Like You" is probably the most likable on first listen, so give her a listen. That's Zooey Deschanel singing with him. You probably know her as Jovie from Elf. She and M. did an album last year under the band name She and Him. I was a huge fan of that album. Listen! "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here" is a good one to start with.

This post is dedicated to Tricia Christopher.

Church on the Q

2009-02-04T15:58:00.003-05:00

Today I walked down to Union Square to get a salad for lunch and some groceries from Whole Foods. On the way there I sort of got lost in a prayer for lots of various things and people that were on my heart.

I got my salad, got my eggs, got my lettuce (so I can make my own salads next time). Then I got on the train to go back to work since I'd run out of time to walk back.

And I sat down, and I heard a clear, tenor, soulful voice start singing:

You are Awesome in this place, Mighty God
You are Awesome in this place, Abba Father
You are worthy of all our praise
To You our lives we raise
You are awesome in this place, Mighty God

As usual, people didn't stare. A few people glanced at the man. He didn't look crazy. I started singing along (...under my breath), and closed my eyes and just enjoyed his song.

I had been thinking earlier about the life I live and if it is a testimony to Christ to everyone I meet. I know that some people I have recently met probably have no clue about my faith and it is something I am resolved to change.

I waited for him to walk around and ask for money, change, a smile, a blessing. But he just stood in the same doorway, got off at the next stop which was also mine, humming as he went...

Febu...Febru...Febur......Feb.

2009-02-03T10:08:00.002-05:00

Oh, hello February. You are a rather boring and cold month and I appreciate you being shorter than all the other months, but I was wondering if you could still try to pick up the pace and go away quickly? You are the month that connects other more fun months, and no one likes transition. But I guess I'll try to make the best of you because I know that time IS indeed, fleeting.

Good morning. I got near 10 hours of sleep last night trying to make up for what I missed over the weekend (does that seem backwards?) and now I'm groggy. I'm drinking less coffee, mostly because work coffee tastes like gasoline without lots of cream and sugar in it. I made some peppermint tea and turned on some Adele to ease into the day.

Hopefully soon I will have some exciting stories to share, let's see if February can exceed my expectations.

It's 2009.

2009-01-28T11:51:00.005-05:00

I turned 24 ten days ago. Here I am in the middle of a cold, snowy winter, about to enter my 18th month at Cherry Lane. Everyone I know that doesn't travel by underground public transportation is home under blankets right now.

I'm at work, chugging a Diet Dr. Pepper, trying to plan a trip to Vermont in February and a trip to Africa in August.

I mean...I'm at work, working.

You might think that you deserve about a years worth of updates, and I might agree with you a little, so here are a few things:

People ask me all the time if I see celebrities. I do on occasion. In recent memory I've seen Robert Downey Jr., Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Mary Kate Olsen, and I saw this guy (whom I recognized from The Lake House...eh) at Borders on Monday.

I like New York, but not just for the reasons I thought I would (my sweeping day dreams of "culture" and "history" and "walking"). I like it for the people: my work friends, my church friends, and all these guys.

I took the dance class.

I joined a choir (and I quit a choir, but maybe not indefinitely).

I still play volleyball and softball with the work team.

I've had things to eat and drink that I never knew existed.

I stopped watching so much TV (not out of any desire for change, more out of necessity). I'd also rather watch Discovery or History than MTV or VH1.

I'm boring myself a little bit. Blogging random stories is so much better than trying to fit a few months into a few words. So I'll try to just stick with that.

I will say that I think this is going to be an exciting year for me with lots of adventures and maybe a few changes. So stay tuned...and I'll do my best to keep you updated when I deem it important enough. Otherwise I'll just update my status on Facebook or something.

Spring Photos

2008-05-01T11:32:00.003-04:00

In lieu of posting about what I've been up lately, I thought I'd show you.

PS- If you are younger than 25, you've already seen these on Facebook.

It's time for a weekend.

2008-04-25T11:11:00.002-04:00

Today I walked from the subway...through Little Korea...to work...with my skirt tucked in my underwear.

Springin'

2008-04-19T22:48:00.003-04:00

Last night was my first softball game since third grade. It was so fun and the weather was perfect. And we won. I think my little cousin, Grant, would be proud, no?

On the way way home I was walking and a man in front of me grabbed the woman he was with at the stop light and started dancing with her. It was cute. They were happy.

Today I went to the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens with Samantha. It's a nice 40 minute walk from our apartment. I broke out the spring dress and we had ourselves a nice time:

Better than folding socks, Alison?

2008-04-13T00:07:00.003-04:00

It reached the SEVENTIES today. I spent five hours cleaning. But then...

Me and Alison and Kate spent our Saturday night outside drinking wine, eating pizza, and blasting Pavarotti from our window.

Yesssss.

"High F above C..."

2008-04-11T18:23:00.003-04:00

Last night I finished reading this book; Julie Andrews' memoir about her life up until she was offered the role of Mary Poppins.

When she was nine she started taking voice lessons and eventually was on the vaudeville stage with her mom and step dad. When she was twelve she began singing in a variety show called the Starlight Roof. The gag was, the host would have all the kids in the audience run up to the stage and he would pick out one to talk to (Julie) and after a few jokes, this random girl from the audience would sing.

She was a hit at first, but became a little boring as she got older and the song she sang got easier. So she showed them what she could do with "Polonaise Mignon."

You have GOT to listen to this. The whole way through. No cheating.

Now go buy the book!

Thank you, spring, for dresses and celebrities.

2008-04-10T14:51:00.002-04:00

Today is sunny and in the 60s and I'm wearing a dress and boots. I couldn't be happier, even though I fell asleep on the couch last night and slept in thus prompting a semi-stressful morning.

I walked down to Union Square on lunch, like I have been doing for awhile now. It's about a mile away but I sit all day, it's nice out, I have a good book, and I like watching people.

But today, everyone and their dog was out. I mean that literally. Including Ethan Hawke and his dog. He walked by me on 21st street near Madison Square Park and was very involved in his phone conversation.

Anyway, it was really tough to find a place to sit down and read today that wasn't on the ground. Would it be weird to bring a lawn chair with me to work? Do they even have lawn chairs in New York?

Brittany makes stuff.

2008-04-10T01:02:00.002-04:00

Check out my other blog that I just created at Alison's persistence.

Friday in the a-p-t.

2008-04-05T00:09:00.003-04:00

Hmm...I spent my Friday night writing music. Two songs, AND I had time to whip up some brownies from scratch. I tell you truly, I am amazing.

I spent the first half of the night finishing up some stuff on the keyboard, then moved on back to my room and pulled out my guitar. It's been too long, guitar.

I added one song to myspace.

"Complete Me"

(I promise the song is not as lame as the title makes it sound...I think)

I've said terrible things
I've done horrible deeds
I was ashamed to tell you
I'm not what I seem
I'm not who they see

Tell me, Lord, that You'll fill the void
When I fall short
I need you, Lord, to fill the void
When I fall short
I'm halfway full
Complete me, complete me, Lord

I'm not good on my own
I'm a wretch on my own
I'm not ashamed to say
That I don't belong
I don't belong here

Tell me, Lord, that You'll fill the void
When I fall short
I need you, Lord, to fill the void
Where I fall short
I'm halfway full
Complete me, complete me, Lord

And isn't is just like You
Just like You
To fill my weary soul
Isn't it just like You
Just like You
Just like You
To mend my broken bones
And make me whole

Lord, please
Show us Your grace
Lord, please
Lead us with faith
We stand unashamed
For You are good to Your word

Tell me, Lord, You'll fill the void
When I fall short
I need you, Lord, to fill the void
Where I fall short
I'm halfway full
Complete me, complete me, Lord

I would like to thank Alison for letting me use her computer while mine is with the mac geniuses getting a new hard drive because mine crashed. We don't need to talk about it.

Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALISON! I love you and I don't know what I'd do without you. I know we joke when we say that but...seriously.

Quips.

2008-03-28T22:40:00.003-04:00

Sometimes I think New York is like my husband. All shiny and exciting at first, and then he gets a belly and, I don't know, stops wearing deodorant. (This is what Alison says while we search for rats to curve boredom while waiting for the train.)

Sometimes I feel like my life is a movie. But then I think, "If my life were a movie, I'd have a better wardrobe." (This is why I spent way too much money on only three items at the largest store in the world after one particularly bad day.)

Brittany, quit flashing gang signs. (This is what my mother yells to me across a crowded subway after I wave my fingers at her. Wave as in, "HI MOM," not as in, "MEET ME LATER TONIGHT WITH THE GOODS.")

Family always makes New York just a little bit prettier =)

My Hands

2008-03-15T01:19:00.006-04:00

About that list...I've been working on the first one. The music one. I started a song on Feb. 21 inspired by the Africa trip this summer. I've written a few about it but It's still in my heart and I think more music will come from it. I worked on it tonight and thought I'd share what I have so far. It's rough...

Click here to listen.

I will apologize
and I'll take the blame for what I've done
I'll study your fearless face and find
You're hopeless for hiding grace

And I would, I'd be on my knees if not for this
Now I would, I'd give you my hands just for this
That you might use them well

You show me your wounded daughter
You tell me I'm ready to fight for her
Please show me your fearless ways
I find I'm helpless without your grace

I see the pain in her eyes
It gives me strength enough to try

And I would, I'd fall on my knees just for this
And I would, I'd give you my hands just for this
And pray they will not fail

For the sons, for the fathers
For the girls without their mothers
For the hope, for the hope of the world
For the suffering to start ending
For the life that's ever flowing
For the victory I see coming
To the horizon we are running
For the hungry and forgotten
For the lovely and the heartless
There is hope, there is hope for the forsaken
For the sons, for the daughters
Only looking for the fathers
There is hope, hope for the forsaken

I'd give up a million things
But I just keep on livin' selfishly
There are days I know there's more to me

I should be on my knees just for this
And I should, give you my hands...

On to the next.

2008-03-14T16:00:00.003-04:00

About six months ago, I wrote a list of things to do. I figure now is a good time to revisit and re-assess:

~~Write music~~
(Write good music)
Send Lauren a letter
(Who cares, she's coming to see me next week)
~~Find a church~~
Get involved in a church
(Working on it)
Join a choir
(I started the process, haven't auditioned yet)
~~Make a photo grid a la the one I saw in Pottery Barn~~ (Re-hang photo grid in new room)
Try writing another (better) children's book
(Haven't started writing yet, but am reading. It's research. )
~~Join a gym~~
Take a cooking class
(Am cooking more. )
Take a language class
(...I have nothing. Although there are some "learn how to speak French" CD's around the apartment somewhere.)
Take guitar lessons
(Still thinking about it.)
Visit Washington DC
(Not yet. )
~~Read~~
(Continue reading. )
Stop buying cheaply made clothes and be satisfied with fewer, nicer ones
(I've done well, here. Mainly due to the fact that I should try to be presentable at work. I dread the day when my boss calls me into his office and tells me I wear my jeans too much and I end up asking for a raise so that I can buy more clothes. I would accidentally do that.)
Develop pictures
(I typed this up before my computer crashed to the floor with my 2,000 Africa pictures. Let's move on. )
Go to some museums
(Easier for me to do when it's warm out. I'm going to some next week!)

You may have noticed how I failed miserably at all matters of classes and further learning. Well, that is not true. I signed up for a dance class that starts in April. Can't help but feel like I'm a little backwards here. I never danced as a little girl. I took baton for awhile, but it was disastrous. I wasn't bad, no. I was just the ONLY GIRL IN THE WHOLE FORT WORTH PARADE WHOSE PARENTS MADE HER WEAR SWEATS INSTEAD OF THE PRETTY RED FRILLY OUTFITS ALL THE OTHER GIRLS WORE. Then I lost my baton. I cried a lot and I never got a new baton. And I was always jealous of the girls who got to go to "make-up" classes. Because I thought it was a class about putting on make-up.

After that experience, I started wearing baggy t-shirts and pony tails and begged my parents to let me play softball. No more girly stuff that was going to break my heart. I bought a shirt that said, "God is life. Everything else is softball." I still have that shirt. In fact, maybe I'll wear it to a game next month after volleyball season ends.

Well, I don't remember where I was going with this.

Oh yeah, I'm doing what every other little girl does, only I'm 23. I still have my character shoes from the last time I danced, high school show choir. I'm pretty nervous about this. Every night for two weeks I almost signed up, then didn't. I was talking to Joey about it on his birthday and it just became clear that I should do it.

So I'm doing it. Paid up front and everything.

On another completely separate note, for the last two days I've had a nervous/excited feeling in my stomach and I can't eat. This could have something to do with the dance class. It could have something to do with my family being here in four days. Or, it could be something else.

PS - Mom, I forgive you for caring about the temperature of my body and making me wear sweats to the parade. I promise you didn't ruin my childhood. In fact, you may have saved me from a life of big hair, pageants, and other stuff that is not nearly as cool as softball. Or show choir...

Infected.

2008-03-11T19:55:00.002-04:00

I guess that it's time I explained...

I have MRSA, a form of the news-making staph infection.

It started on my leg in October. Then again on my leg, then my eyebrow over Thanksgiving. I went to the doctor the first time and got antibiotics. The 2nd and 3rd time it wasn't so bad, so I let it "run it's course," so-to-speak. Then last week I woke up and my lip was swollen. I decided to go to a clinic the 2nd day because it was looking pretty bad. He just gave me a prescription and I went back to work. The next day I woke up and it was twice the size. So I went to the ER. The actual infection was above my lip, but had made a whole side of my face swell up. I think that picture was from Thursday. The stupid doctor in the ER gave me more medicine but he did not help me at all. HELLO, my face is a balloon. Something is wrong with me.

Friday I went to the dermatologist. She finally helped me. She also hurt me a freaking lot. She had to put a needle in my face to numb me and I felt that thing go deep. Then she told me to close my eyes while she got a sample. I don't know what she did, but I still felt it. Then I started getting sick. I had planned on eating breakfast at work (I was crazy for thinking I'd be going to work), so I was on an empty stomach. It was not a good feeling. They started running around, lying me down, turning off the lights, finding food and water...

But it's okay. She gave me more medicine, a cream that I have to stick in my nose. It's supposed to get rid of the infection that I've been carrying for months entirely.

I was back at work on Monday and my face has, in a way, shrunk all the way down since Friday.

Two good things came from this:

I started watching Lost from the beginning online while I was at home with nothing to do. I haven't seen the first two seasons. This is good for me. Bad for the social life.

I looked really funny and although it hurt to laugh at the time, it's still very funny.

Woo hoo....adventures in the big city!

Botox gone bad?

2008-03-06T09:14:00.001-05:00

I just thought I'd share with you what I've been dealing with the last few days. Those are my lips.

Weird New York

2008-02-27T16:36:00.003-05:00

Today I walked to Union Square on my lunch break. There was a man sitting outside of the 5-Story Barnes & Noble affectionately playing with his white rat.

My Oscar Picks

2008-02-25T23:02:00.010-05:00

WORST DRESSED

Bad:

George Clooney with the girl who is simply called, "Sarah." She is a former Fear Factor contestant who met GC when she was his waitress. I am sure she is a very nice girl, but she looks like a twig on a chipping birch tree.

Worse:

It's sort of a funny joke. She's Daniel Day Lewis' wife. She knows she's going to sit on the front row and she might as well wear something ridiculous because she also knows her husband is probably going to win his second Oscar. That's right, the girl with the ugly dress' husband won another Oscar. Whatchu gonna say now?

Absolute Worst:

I just can't see her as anything but the White Witch, even in this black velvet blanket. Her acceptance speech offered her a bit of redemption, though, when she poked fun of George Clooney and his batsuit. Girl has a personality!

BEST DRESSED

Good:

Amy Adams gets major points for singing a song about rodents scrubbing the toilet at the most prestigious event in Hollywood and pulling it off. She rocked this dress! Original color that goes great with her hair, and an awesome cut.

Better:

Heidi knows she's hot. Why is she at the Oscar's? Who knows. But that color (which was very popular and a nice surprise) and the top of that dress? LOVE it.

Best:

I LOVE this dress. And it looks fabulous on her. The fabric is beautiful, the way it catches the light. The cut with the train in the back is like Audrey in Sabrina. And the random sleeves work! She was my favorite of the whole night, for sure.

And now just for kicks, my favorite guy of the night:

Jason Bateman :)

So...what do you guys think?

Though the world is fast asleep...

2008-02-24T00:30:00.004-05:00

Well, it seems that in the future I'll need to rely on things besides the weather to get me to update, but for now, I am pleased with being encouraged by snow. I am sure most of you know by now, but on Friday morning, I woke up to this:

And I trudged to work in this:

That's right. I trudged!!

My roommates and I are watching Samantha and Caleb's dog this weekend. Convenient enough for me, he wanted to go outside when I got home, and I needed a friend to play in the snow with me. So begins our two-hour walk:

I took him to Prospect Park. The park pretty much took my breath away. I had landed in a post card. It was almost silent but for the other few out with their dogs, or having a snowball fight, or trying to snowboard...yes, saw that. I walked into the middle of a field and laid down in the snow and just took it all in.

Happy in the snow :)

I met a lady walking two dogs and ended up talking with her and walking to her place. She told me a little of her story and I told her a little of mine. I was hesitant to talk to her when she first said something, anxious to get on with my evening alone, but after she briefly mentioned her divorce and after I realized how normal two people talking is, I was happy to go against my "blinders-always-on" instinct. I don't know if she was lonely, but I think we needed to meet. And it was a good night.

Today I planned on going to Central Park but it didn't snow anymore, so I figured it wouldn't be as nice. So I stayed in and walked Fargo down the street to our bagel place and felt like I was a part of all this. Snow on the ground in Brooklyn, walking a dog and eating my bagel. Then I did my chore for the week (we have a chart), which was cleaning the kitchen. My favorite of the chores because I use it the most. I also cleaned my room. I did all that after I watched four or so episodes of Arrested Development which came from Netflix a few days ago. If any of you have the time to watch that show, do. But be sure to watch it from the beginning. You'll find out where Michael Cera and Jason Bateman came from before Superbad and Juno. You'll also find out where Scott Bayo and Henry Winkler ended up, among others. Plus there is rumors of a MOVIE!

So on to the next...I decided to go to the grocery store down the street to buy some fruit, bread and chicken. I made up a recipe that involves chicken with lime juice and bread crumbs. It's very, very good, I think.

After a little dinner, I got on the train to go babysit. I left an hour early, which is normally okay, but the trains were not moving tonight so I ended up jumping in a cab around 34th street (I was headed to 72nd near Central Park). I was rather annoyed but then decided that if there is any place to be late and stuck and traffic, it is Times Square. Not terrible, really.

This has got to be my favorite part of the day: I totally had a Mary Poppins moment.

Since I've been here I've been baby-sitting for two little girls most Saturday nights. Sometimes I sing to them and normally when I do, they just stare at me. I think hearing someone sing must be an amazing thing when it is brand new. Tonight right before bedtime I was sitting on the floor, holding the baby and helping her older sister put on her pajamas. I started singing, "Stay Awake," the song Mary Poppins sings after a long day in London and the children don't want to sleep. Well, totally cute and unexpected, the girl gets her pjs and and then sits on my knee and cuddles up with me and her sister. And they just sat there and listened to me sing. And I didn't want to move!

But I did, I put the baby to sleep and walked out to see her sister sleeping on the couch where she normally waits for me to read out of her favorite book, her children's bible. Not kidding.

When I walked out of the apartment, I heard an older man tell some older other people, "Well, goodnight kids."

Then I saw an older woman walking a tiny dog. He was trailing her and decided to roll over without her knowing. She kept walking, therefore, dragging the dog. I had to cover my mouth to keep from laughing to loud.

I decided to walk a little over half a mile to the next subway stop so that I could look over Central Park.

It was quiet, but I could still see all the lights and millions of cabs next to me.

I passed a couple. The girl was whining, "I want to be in a cab right now." The guy said, "Just walk with me. Come on, give me your arm." I felt for him.

I saw an older couple on the subway. The woman looped her arm through her husband's who made a joke about her almost knocking him off his chair in the process. I was happy for them.

I went to Starbucks for a tall, skim, white hot chocolate because snow calls for hot drinks and chocolate, as I've already said. They charged me too much and gave me something with coffee in it. Oh well.

And then I read my book (Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis: it gets you thinking and makes me feel comforted, safe, challenged) until my stop came.

I worked on a song I wrote this week for about thirty minutes and now I'm sitting on the couch with Fargo, listening to my top 25 most played on itunes (includes Jon Foreman, Sara Bareilles, Harry Connick Jr.).

I rarely talk about the day-to-day things that I do and have had a few requests for something of the sort, so here it is.

I wasn't consistently happy all day but I feel happy now at the end of the day and since the end typically sums up everything else, I think it is safe to say that it was a happy day.

Now it is passed my bedtime and I've still got some reading to do, so I leave you now. Goodnight!

"The Lord of Darkness..."

2008-02-17T15:59:00.002-05:00

Yesterday marked my six months with NYC. I won't go over the list of things that have changed or the list of things that have stayed the same, for that matter. Overall, things are great and I have no plans to run away in the near future.

But I am a little bit sad, to be honest. New York winter is not what I thought that it would be. WHERE is the SNOW? It snowed once in November and once last week, which was nice, until it rained for about twelve hours the day after. I knew that the rain was coming, so I did my best to enjoy it while it lasted.

The view from our apartment:

I sat by the window and read and drank the first of many, many hot chocolates last week:

And then I finished up with an Audrey Hepburn movie:

So it is still cold and still dark and I am ready for the sun and I can't wait to go to the beach.

But here's hoping I'll see Central Park in the snow sometime soon because I am just not used to thee long, long winters...

Well Kate's family is telling us what to do and that includes putting away my computer. Sorry for the abrupt ending, but it's okay because I think I'm pretty boring right now!

Branching Out

2008-01-28T11:24:00.000-05:00

I switched rooms this weekend and have a roommate now. We love our room! We painted it a few weeks ago and on Saturday we painted the brilliant purple tree. I can't stop dancing in the new space!

I want my mommy and I'm not ashamed.

2008-01-17T20:41:00.000-05:00

When you leave work early Monday afternoon because you feel like you suddenly have sawdust stuck in your throat (but you promise you'll be back tomorrow).

When you make a nest on the couch because you know you won't have the strength to climb up and down your lofted bed three or more times in the middle of the night.

When tomorrow comes and the sawdust is still there and hey! Now there is a fever, too.

When you call in sick to work for the first time in your "adult" life (but you promise you'll be back tomorrow).

When you want to sleep in but you can't stop moving a single part of your body long enough to breathe straight.

When you can't watch your favorite sitcom because fits of laughter turn into fits of cough...ter.

When it takes all of your strength to stand up and peel an orange.

When your fever won't break.

When you can't speak at normal volumes.

When your fever still won't break.

When you finally sleep through the night.

When you wake up and find your fever STILL WON'T BREAK.

When you call in sick for the second time in your "adult" life (this time, no promises).

When you begin to fear the strep.

When you decide to walk a block to the family clinic.

When the family clinic is filled with rows of sick people watching Montel in a pink and green pastel waiting room that is in itself enough to make you sick.

When you don't have any cash so the lady says, "you can just pay me next time."

When you find out for the first time since you were five you have the flu.

When you're too tired to wait in line for the throat numbing prescription at the pharmacy.

When your sick of starving yourself so you order a pizza for $18 that you can hardly eat so your roommates have at it.

When not even watching Mr. Darcy for two hours makes you feel any better.

When you decided your fever WILL go away and you WILL sleep in your bed and you WILL go to work.

When you go to work (...with a slight fever).

When you make it through the day okay.

Until.

You walk home with no umbrella in freezing temperatures and a mixture of wind, rain, and snow beat you down and force you to walk fast against your sad immune system's will until finally you arrive in your apartment with your heart beating in your neck and your lungs as dry as a really, really dry place.

When you have to carry your laundry down the stairs and out the door in that same weather on that same night because if you don't do it tonight, you have no underwear tomorrow. And you don't want to go through that again...

When tomorrow is your 23rd birthday.

When you know you are going to feel sick on your 23rd birthday.......

....is when all you really need is your mom and your dad and your sister and your sister.

I can't wait to see you guys on Saturday. SCREW the FLU! Who's with me?

Coming to America.

2008-01-03T23:43:00.000-05:00

This is the inspiring true story about two ugly cousins journeying across the tumultuous seas from dinosaur-infested Germany to America, the land of beauty and hot dog carts.

Their names were Ludkhanna and Brunhilde Lienhardt. AKA number 24 and number 25 (at least that's what the Americans called them).

Please enjoy the following picture-story, beginning with the day they first boarded the USS Giganatee en route to New York City:

After eight months of living in 4x4 quarters with their own waste, Ludkhanna and Brunhilde finally caught glimpse of lady liberty.

Upon seeing Ellis Island, the girls could not wait to wait some more in a big room where they would hopefully be admitted into America.

Here is a special photo of a fellow immigrant. He was obviously in awe of what his future would hold. He was also cold.

After washing herself of her waste, the first place that Ludkhanna wanted to go was the famous Times Square.

Soon, the girls noticed they were ravished. They found solace in the German word, "wienerwurst," but they were more intrigued by the "Old Kentucky Whiskey".

[photos of Whiskey drinking not found]

But before we continue with the story, let us remember first where the cousins came from:
'Twas a dark, scary place. Where dinosaurs roamed the earth. Lundky tried to fend of the ferocious monster with a mysterious light that sometimes spoke at her and called her, "Ena".

Brunhilde, however, had no such mysterious light, and was forced to sing lullabies to the monster. The monster actually fell in love with her because he mistook her face for that of a fellow beast.

It was also severely cold in their home country.

Brunhilde skinned a 'coon to wear on her head to keep her warm and to make a fashion statement.

The girls missed their family from their home country. Here is Brunhilde in the last photo ever taken of her and the uncle that riased her, Edviener.

Ludkhannah had a much larger family. With 25 brothers and sisters, Ludky was the first to leave home.

Now, back to Ellis Island. Unfortunately, Brunhilde did not know how to write. Or hold a pencil. She is listed in the annals of Ellis Island history as: "~~~\/~ kumquat"
A young american on-looker could not believe her eyes.

Ludkhanna could write well and she laughed in Brunhilde's face shortly after this photo was taken.

Brunhilde was so excited to see the American Flag that she wanted to eat it.

Ludkhanna was still hunched over from the 4x4 living quarters.

Ludkhanna loved the underground tunnels so much, that she often danced around with the poles.

When the cousins realized they had only been eating flour and water for eight months, they decided to test the local fair. Brunhilde swallowed the triangluar meal in one bite.

Ludkhanna was mezmerized that a pig could be so small on a piece of bread.

The cousins realized their options for settling were limitless. Ludkhanna wanted to see Indian Territory. She heard they didn't wear underwear.

Ludkhanna could not believe the people were frolicking on a pond in front of an ice god.

The two cousins decided to board at the glowing pink mansion, Hotel Barbie. Ludkhanna lost her key and got trapped on the left side of the Barbie sign.

Ludkhanna also enjoyed shopping at a magical place called Chelsea Market.

The girls were having a WICKED awesome TIME, and even made friends with a DRAGON (Brunhilde refrained from singing lullabies).

In conclusion, America was a transforming place from this....

to this:

Henceforth, the girls are called "Paris" and "Brit Brit."

THE END.

Halloween.

2007-11-01T10:50:00.001-04:00

happy Brittany and Alison.

Dirk Nowitzki.

2007-10-23T23:20:00.000-04:00

...and everything will be okay.

2007-10-07T21:20:00.000-04:00

My computer died. I lost everything. All of my lyrics, all of my song ideas, all of my pictures (which includes thousands from Africa), all of my school assignments, music...I haven't cried yet but I'm afraid if I keep adding to this list...

I am typing to you from a brand new $1,300 computer. It's nice, sure. But I want my dirty, cracked computer back. I made that comment to my roommate earlier and we laughed for awhile, but it's true.

This post, however, is not about my generally bad weekend; it is about Paul, the 58-year-old man from New Zealand that I met today at the Apple store on 5th Avenue.

After hearing the bad news that my computer was long lost, I stepped outside to call my cousin, Jesse, an Apple employee for some advice, and then my mother for some comfort. Then I walked back in to the store, ready to quickly grab a computer and go.

That is not what happened.

"Why did you bring that computer here?" He is a small man, about my height, with short gray hair and reading glasses resting at the tip of his nose. He is standing in front of one of the laptops, gmail open, and a briefcase with papers resting on the table next to him. He speaks with an accent; a few minutes later I learn he is from New Zealand. That, and about a thousand other things.

"Oh, it fell off my bed this morning and now I need to buy a new one."

We talk about the computer for about a minute. Then he asks if I am a student. "No," I said, "I graduated in May."

He asks me where I work and what music publishing is. Then he tells me he wrote a song called "Venus" and asks me what he should do with it. I give him the best advice I can, thinking this person might be a little bit crazy, but I am intrigued nonetheless.

He starts telling me about the song. He can't explain it the way he wants to, so he tries to find the common link:

"Have you ever been in love?" he asks.

I laugh, "No, I haven't."

The look on his face is pure bewilderment. "You haven't?"

I shake my head. He is looking at me in a very serious way, as if what is about to happen next might change my entire path in life.

"Do you mind if I told you a story?"

A strange man in an underground computer store on one of the busiest streets in New York City wants to tell me a story. This is about the moment that I start wondering if the whole reason my computer fell off the bed was for this conversation.

He tells me he was 19 years-old when Janice, a cricket player, knocked on his door to tell him she had accidentally knocked a ball into his yard. He said that he opened the door, looked into her eyes and he fell in love.

This is when he takes off his glasses, folds them, and sits them on the table. His face is red. There are tears in his eyes.

He tells me that they dated all summer, but there was a distance that made it hard for the two of them to travel at the time. But he loved her. Not just because she was beautiful, not because he "saw something in her eyes," not because it felt good. He really loved her. (He also told me that he didn't love her because they had "consumated"...because they hadn't. Little shocking, but okay, I get it.)

Thirty years later, he is working at a marina selling boats in London. He sees a woman with blonde hair standing on the pier and she notices him hop from boat to boat, appearing as if he knows what he's doing. So she approaches him with questions about sailing. He asks if she would like to join him on a short sailing trip, ("I wasn't hitting on her," he says, "I just always look for an excuse to sail.") and she agrees. Then he introduces himself.

"Paul."

Paul. She knows this Paul. She has seen him before...

"Paul? My name is Janice. Do you remember me?"

She introduced herself with her married name, but still his heart begins to pound. He realizes that he know two Janice's. Janice B. and Jancice T. Janice T...the Janice.

"Were you at once Janice B?"

"No, I was Janice Thompson."

This is the second time that the man standing in front of me in the Apple store begins to cry. I cannot take my eyes away from him. Not for one second.

He tells me that Janice's husband had just passed and that he himself was at the end of a strangling relationship. He tells me that Janice renews his hope and his gustow (they still did not "consumate"), and Paul begins to have a vision for a way to help poverty-stricken families around the globe. Janice inspires him and he spends everything he has, over half a million dollars, on funding this organization. All that he now owns he can fit into two bags. He is meeting with President Bill Clinton this Wednesday to present his ideas.

"Changing poverty into prosperity."

I am blown away.

"How old are you? 24?" He asks. I tell him I am 22.

"You are still young. But you are growing, and your friends are starting to get married, right? Well, you. You wait. It might not be until you are 35, but you wait. You wait for the right husband who will love you the way you should be loved. It will be worth it."

(This, by the way, is the second time a stranger has stopped me in a public place and told me something about my marriage should be like. The first was a security guard at a museum in Nashville.)

"I don't know why I am doing this, but can I tell you another story?"

For the second time I smile and say, "Sure."

"The woman I am e-mailing right now, I met her on the train at Victoria Station." ("I've been there!" I say, "This summer!")

He tells me how they are the only two on the train so he sits next to her and says, "All the others are taken."

She is not a beautiful woman, he says, but she is kind and she is funny. They keep in touch and Paul tells me that he has fallen in love with her.

This, by the way, is the third time that Paul's face reddens and I see the tears form in his eyes.

He talks about how we have the ability to do much and when two people unite, the power between them is infinite. "And how can we fail," he says, "when the whole universe is based on creativity. It all began with creativity. These ideas I have are to better the world and I know that there will be hard times, but there is no possible way that I can fail. A door closed is another door opened. We have not been brought this far to fail."

Wow.

"I can tell that you are a positive person, Brittany. Do you know how I can tell that?"

"How?"

"Because you are still standing here."

(Are you sure that doesn't mean that I am just crazy?)

"I don't know why I am telling you these stories, but other people would have just gotten angry. Or they would have walked away and ignored me. You are not that way."

I am not that way.

But he doesn't see how annoyed I get on the trains when people talk to loud or stand in my way or cannot control their children. He does not see how I jolt by the woman who cannot carry her baby's stroller down the stairs alone.

I am not that way...

I know that nobody is perfect, not even this love fool, poverty hero from New Zealand, but here is the thing. We aren't that way. None of us. He is right, in a sense. We are not born to be that way.

He also tells me that it's just a computer and it's just money and that everything will be okay. Which is exactly what mom said.

"You might as well throw the damn thing to the floor again," he laughs.

"Because everything will be okay."

Rotten Apple.

2007-10-07T11:49:00.000-04:00

This morning I awoke to a bang. The bang of my computer falling off my lofted bed and onto the wood floor. It will not turn on. I want to cry.

[title?]

2007-10-06T16:30:00.000-04:00

I didn't know that the title of your blog really determines a lot in the blog world. I am dissatisfied with mine and I want a new one. But I can't think of anything.

Today I baked, did laundry, went to the grocery store, and ironed. One of my roommates said I make her feel inadequate. It is sort of strange being a Susy homemaker in the city. You have to walk to the store and you have to carry your laundry down the street and at the end of the day your arms hurt from all of the loading. Also, it is hot and it is October.

Well, in the theme of the day, I'm off to babysit.

Bed bugs, mice, and roaches...oh my.

2007-10-03T21:59:00.001-04:00

We have all of them. We are in the process of de-cluttering our apartment to spray for bed bugs. We saw a mouse so there are traps all over the place. One of these traps caught a roach. The mouse is still alive and well...and decided to visit us during Pushing Dasies tonight.

Here are some photos if you're interested.

PS- Saw the Lady on the way home...happy.

Tale of the Lady

2007-10-03T13:13:00.000-04:00

The train that I take to work actually picks up at an above ground stop. It travels another two stops above ground, above traffic, until it plunges back into the underground. It is a local train, which means it generally is a longer ride than if I were to take the express, but I like this train because there is a moment, right before it dips into the dark, right after it passes a tall glass building, where I gain a little bit of hope and inspiration to help me get through the day. For about five seconds, I can see Lady Liberty. Cheesy? Well I'm about to get worse. She is this incredible symbol of American history and here I am, within view of her. I just feel like if she can stand there, bear the winter and the rain, then so can I.

Today I needed to see her pretty badly. The train was packed and I could hardly see through the swarm of people. There I stood, coffee in one hand, the other gripped tight to the railing, twisting my head around, hoping for a peak. Finally, the valley between the buildings, I stand up on my toes, ready to be inspired. And she is not there. The Statue of Liberty. Is gone. I'm freaking out. Shouldn't we tell somebody? F Train! Unite! Where is the Lady?

And then I realize. She has succombed to her only enemy.

Fog.

A foggy day in New York town.

On another note, how do we feel about wearing yoga pants to work? I for one, feel good about it. Since I am wearing yoga pants to work today. But don't start yelling yet, mom, this is not relapse of me trying to sneak out to school in pajama pants. I paired them with a short striped dress and some sweet kicks. I almost look like a trendy, tight-wearing New Yorker.

I'll let you know if the Lady defeats the fog this evening. I am pretty faithful that she can make it through.

Visuals

2007-09-20T21:06:00.000-04:00

Want to see where I work?

Here is my desk:

Do you see my cactus? Yea! Love it. I've put up a few pictures and organized everything...it's getting there.

This is the corner of my area and my view to the right. That door is the VP of business affairs office, whom I assist.

The other side...

The CEO's office, whom I also assist.

And now, a few pictures of my room. It's far from finished, but I'm just really proud of this Africa photo grid that I just finished:

Hi! That's the ribbon I bought at M&J.

It looks sad. I want my bed!!

A few of my favorite things...

2007-09-19T08:30:00.000-04:00

There are some things that I do not like in New York. Like moving. And how it takes weeks. But there are other things...

Two days ago I had my groceries delievered to me. Yes. Rang the doorbell and carried the whole thing up and sat it on the counter. Online grocery shopping is going to be my new favorite thing when the temperatures drop here.

M & J Trimming. Ever wonder where Calvin Klein and Donna Karen go for supplies? Well it's this place. It's in the fashion district and it's a short walk from where I work. I always wanted to go there but had no reason. But I needed some ribbon to hang a mirror with, so yesterday I went on my lunch break and got some beautiful deep red satin ribbon. Check this place out:

Blick. This website does not do the store justice. I needed an exacto knife for a Pottery Barn inspired photo project I am working on and stopped here on the way home from work. It's in NOHO (North of Houston St. as apposed to SOHO...South) which is a really cool area and let me just tell you. They have the COOLEST art supplies. Tons of canvases. Must go back soon.

Here is what the NY store looks like from the outside.

Also found out our closest grocery store (about 1/3 mi. away) delivers for $2 when you check out. Worth it!

More furniture...

2007-09-16T22:40:00.000-04:00

What a weekend.

I wheeled the dresser down in some partial rain and hit a few snags but I made it. Even manouvered around the couch stuck in the stairs and got it in the apartment. It's great. I love it.

My bed arrived! Yep. It came in 3 boxes. Box 2/3, box 2/3 and box 3/3. See anything wrong? Well I did when I opened two boxes, each that had a ladder in them. You don't need two ladders for a lofted bed do you? Nope. They sent me an extra box 2/3 instead of box 1/3. All this time waiting...and I am still waiting. And it will be up to two weeks until I get box 1. ADSJFBLAJKDGI;AIDSFUIASDFJJKBAG. Mad.

But it will be okay...

Today we got a new couch. Movers brought it up and got the other couch out of the hall which we sold to some Bulgarians on craigslist for $50. We also got three bar stools and a bookcase for total about $90 at Target. We had a crazy "cab" ride back (it was actually some guy in an SUV?). Target in NY is CRAZY and really annoying sort of.

Anyway...the apartment is coming along and we are in love with it. I promise there will be pictures soon.

Adventures with furniture and so on...

2007-09-15T09:14:00.000-04:00

Aunt Christine tagged me for a "meme" which I have never heard of in my whole life, but I have chosen to participate:

You have to post these rules before you give the facts.

Players - You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don't have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.

At the end of your post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.

R - REALLY dumb. I am really dumb because I am about to wheel a dresser half a mile down the street that I am buying from someone on craigslist. Also because I spent my Friday night with my roommate trying to move a couch down two flights of stairs that it does NOT fit through. The results:

This is as far as we got. So what happens when I try to move my dresser upstairs and when my bed gets delivered later to day AND when our brand new BIGGER couch gets delievered tomorrow? Hmm...really dumb.

O - ORGANIZED. Because that is what I am trying to do this weekend, get the apartment organized and really stinkin' cute.

S - SIMPLE. I love the magazine Real Simple.

E - EXCITED to watch Felicity season 3 while I am waiting for my bed to arrive this afternoon. Excited for my bed to actually arrive. Excited to babysit for two little girls tonight on the Upper West Side. To me, this is a fun Saturday.

So Christine, you think you have no blog friends? Well...unfortunately the only blogs I read are yours and Perez Hilton on occasion. Since I don't think I could tag Perez, I'm going to try something different. I want the first four people who read this blog to leave me a comment with your middle name meme. Mom, I really want you to do this because your middle name is ELIZABETH and that is just crazy. Same for Lauren. Tracy would be easy because she's just Beth. Anyway, four people. Leave a comment.

This morning I made a really yummy, healthy breakfast, and I thought I'd share. I used two egg whites, a little milk, and two slices of high fiber flaxseed bread (it's good! I like the nutty flavor) to make french toast (with Pam, not butter). Then I warmed up about a half a cup of blueberries until there was lots of juice and mixed in two packets of splenda. Poured them on top and wa-la. It was sooo good. Do I sound like a health freak? I'm really not. I ate almost everything in the candy dish the other day at work. I think I go back and forth between two extremes as far as healthy goes.

Well mom wants me to blog about my experience with John Denver's brother. Maybe next time...I have to go get the dresser.

Things to do:

2007-09-13T23:14:00.000-04:00

Write music
Send Lauren a letter
Find a church
Get involved in a church
Join a choir
Make a photo grid a la the one I saw in Pottery Barn
Try writing another (better) children's book
Join a gym
Take a cooking class
Take a language class
Take guitar lessons
Visit Washington DC
Read
Stop buying cheaply made clothes and be satisfied with fewer, nicer ones
Develop pictures
Go to some museums

I have all these things in my head about what I want to do now that my evenings and weekends are free of any homework and I was tired of them swimming around and some of them becoming forgotten. So, hopefully I can start crossing things off this list.

Since I don't have a guitar here yet and I am sick of biting my nails, I've been letting them grow and using the really cool file mom gave me. It's weird.

The people that stand in the booths in the subway are generally...mean. I say generally because, of course, not all of the people that sit in the underground booths wake up with an incredibly sour disposition, but most of them just seem to. So today when I was riding the train home and I saw one of these "booth people" standing outside the booth smiling and saluting the driver of the train, it was just enough to make me feel really happy despite the dark, dirty underground. I noticed things like this a lot more often last year, when I knew that I would be here for a definite time. I'm going to try to still notice those things despite the now indefinite time...it's probably still important.

And if I seem distracted ever...it is because I am still addicted to Felicity. And Tracey, I will definitely let you know what I think of the end.

Sometimes you can't make it on your own...

2007-09-10T23:45:00.000-04:00

Saw him today:

I was going to Borders on my lunch break, which is connected to Madison Square Garden, where Oprah was filming a few episodes today. I don't know if Bono had anything to do with Oprah, but all of the sudden there were people and cameras, and I'm just trying to find a way into the bookstore, not realizing that I'm getting closer to Bono, but I was. I turned around and hey, it's Bono. Too bad I wasn't wearing my (RED) shirt.

That is probably because my (RED) shirt is still in Texas. With all my other belongings. Mother, don't feel guilty.

Can you tell that I'm restless?

So...what to say, what to say...I know! I love you guys and it is so fun to read comments from my aunts and cousins and friends because you are all very awesome. And to Christine, I promise to post pictures of the apartment by the end of the month. Because I want you guys to be so dang jealous of where I live that you just have to get on a plane and experience it for yourselves. Ha!

Alright, I'm a workin' girl. Bedtime!

Diversions

2007-09-09T02:11:00.000-04:00

It's funny how whenever I set out to do something (mostly when I am alone) in this city, what I wanted to do in the first place hardly ever happens.

Last night I wanted to go to bed early because the week had left me just exhausted. I thought maybe I'd watch a movie to wind down, so I looked through my roommates' movies (since most of my belongings are still elsewhere) and found three DVD seasons of the television show "Felicity." If you haven't seen the show, here are the basics:

Bookish California girl graduates high school with plans to follow in her father's footsteps and become a pre-med student at Stanford. However, surprise, surprise, this is not what she really wants. So when her crush-from-a-far writes a nice note in her yearbook, she decides on little more than a whim to follow him to NYU where she eventually falls for her RA instead. That's how far I've gotten.

I should have been weary of my weakness to addicting television shows, especially stories about girls moving to New York and working at my favorite coffee shop (and it has been fun to see what Hollywood's perception of being an RA is). Basically, I will no doubt finish season one by the end of the weekend (there are only two more episodes to watch), thereby wasting my time watching a really likeable girl explore her life in this city instead of doing so myself. I feel a little guilty about this...? But the thing is, I just love stories. And sometimes, a good story is just what I need to really feel creative again, which is a feeling that I thrive on.

So anyway, today. Today I had every intention of going to a huge BBQ for work, and I was really excited about it. But as it is my first weekend living in Brooklyn and I cannot yet gage time frames from here to various places, I was late getting to Grand Central Station, which was were people were meeting to get on a train and go to the BBQ. I figured I could just go alone, but when I went to call someone, I noticed my phone died. Which, by the way, has been happening way too much lately at the most inopportune times. So since I had no idea how to get to the BBQ, I thought I'd do something else (obviously), like go read in the park. But it was just so hot and, well, I don't really know what happened next. I sort of succombed to this dream state (because despite my exhaustion, I had only slept for five hours the night before) and I eventually found myself at Fairway, a really great grocery store on 72nd street. And on the West Side, or in my mind, "You've Got Mail" land. It's actually one of my favorite areas in Manhattan.

I was craving fruit, especially mangos. I love mangos since being in Kenya and I had a wonderful mango from a grocery store down the street the other day. So I bought two mangos, two pounds of strawberries, five kiwi (is "kiwi" the plural of kiwi? "kiwis" sounds strange...), and a brownie mix. Because I felt like baking but didn't want to lug all of the ingredients for homemade brownies all the way back.

Next, I came home and watched some more Felicity. And I took a nap. A late nap; one of those where you don't wake up until it's dark outside. I HATE those naps. Now it is 2:30 AM and I am disoriented and feeling a little sad about missing the BBQ, even though I am happy to have had some downtime.

I guess I am trying to avoid typing out diary worthy thoughts right now; I am more concerned about recording the events of the day-to-day than all my icky "feelings," but I cannot help admit that I seem to be in such a boring, melancholy state of "in-between" right now. I knew to expect it and yes, I know I have not even been here for a month, but I am so much more the person who wants to immediately settle into the next thing. Even something to put my clothes in besides my suitcase would make me feel like I was taking one giant step forward.

Oh well, that day will come. Until then, here's hoping for a more eventful Sunday and lots of witty, humorous blogs in the future.

PS- Did anybody notice how I diverted from the topic of diversion? To the side of me that pushes her glasses up her nose and snorts on occasion, that actually IS fairly humorous...

I found a home.

2007-09-06T20:32:00.000-04:00

Well, it seems the dust has cleared.

This Friday marks my three week anniversary at my job and...I finally have my very own room to sleep in.

Okay, so who thought finding an apartment in New York City would be harder than finding a job in New York City? Please. I looked at some pretty rotten places in between witnessing a drug deal and being followed by someone who kept yelling something at me about being white. I was constantly on the internet, e-mailing, searching, e-mailing, breaking down...and finally. A phone call from a friend from college and a few days later, I am living in a fabulous three bedroom apartment with three fabulous girls in the fabulous (safe) neighborhood of Park Slope in Brooklyn. And it is only a thirty minute train ride to work, which is faster than my Harlem commute. I tell you, I am in good hands.

I guess now I am just waiting for normalcy to kick in. It all still feels so un...permanent.

I forgot to mention that Target is a few stops away and it is on my way home from work AND there is a Guitar Center right by it. Target!!

Everyday all I think about is when all the things I've ordered from various furniture/housewares stores and all of the boxes from home are going to arrive. I know that "things" won't make this place a home, but those things do come with a sense of the people that have surrounded them.

But I am ready, I really am, to finally look out with no grasp of the end, and call this place home.

Just breathe.

2007-08-21T22:35:00.000-04:00

Hello...?

I feel like I have just stepped back one year in time. I never decided to stop blogging (that is still a horrible word) after I moved back to Nashville and Texas, I just never really had the desire to keep it up. But I have been in New York for four days, and I keep thinking of writing. I think it's a combination of 1) knowing that my mother loves to read these and 2) things just constantly happen in New York that are worthy of writing down. So...I am going to write them down.

Here is some important groundwork for this next round in my life:
1. I now have a job where I was previously interning a year ago. It is a blessing. It is perfect. After three days, I love it, and I really don't think I'm being too overly optimistic by thinking that won't change two years from now.
2. I don't have an apartment. I am staying with my best friend and her husband of one year, and dog of a few months, in a studio apartment in Harlem.

Those are the only things I am thinking about lately; do well at my job, get an apartment.

And of course....breathe.

Soundtrack

2006-12-07T23:04:00.000-05:00

Saw this and I just want to keep doing it over and over:

If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool...

Opening credits
Belle - Jack Johnson

Waking up
To Know You - Nichole Nordeman

First day of school
Stop This Train - John Mayer

Falling in Love
I Have a Hand, One Heart - Barbra Streisand with Johnny Mathis (are you serious)

Fight Song
My Love - Bebo Norman (superb choice)

Breaking Up
Where's The Love - Hanson (right on!!)

Prom
Dreaming With A Broken Heart - John Mayer

Life
Fix You Up - Tegan and Sara

Driving
Our Mystery - Bebo Norman

Flashback
Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Harry Nilsson (aka "You've Got Mail Version, " dig it)

Getting back together
It's All Coming Back To Me Now - Celine Dion (niiiice)

Wedding
You Can Do It - No Doubt

Party
Look At Her Face - The Coral Sea

Birth of a Child
Clarity - John Mayer (PERFECT)

Death scene
Five Candles - Jars Of Clay

Funeral song
My Love - Justin Timberlake

Ending credits
Teresa - Peter Bradley Adams

Ok, not gonna lie. I cheated a little. But I'm not going to tell you where. How fun is that?! I like it.

Tomorrow is my last day of internship. I feel nervous because good bye...I just hate it. I really hope I can somehow get across how thankful I am for the experiences I had and people I met there.

There are a lot of quirky stories I didn't have time to type up and I'm sad about that. I guess it's not that bad to be busy living. But there is a certain need for reflection.

I just was overcome with the Lord's love for a second. It is really big, y'all.

I said y'all in honor of me being in Texas in a week. In fact, you know what else? Yee haw! That's right, folks. Hm, one more...djeat? I heard someone today say "did you eat yet?" Sorry, it's djeat.

Hopefully I will fight with my boyfriend one day so that I scream, "Where's the love? It's not enough!!!!" I can't wait for that.

Also can't wait to pull out my rusty hands and play some piano.

Well, I'm tired, busy, important and all that. Bye!

30 Rock

2006-12-02T18:26:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was Conan. We saw Tom Brokaw, Ed Burns, and Sarah McLachlan...and of course Conan. What a funny/professional guy. I like him. Afterwards I walked around Rockafellar Plaza, checked out the tree and all...

Now here is something exciting: next week pick up the new US Weekly and see my contribution. I am one of the "We polled 100 people in Rockafellar Plaza and..." people. I'm one of the 100. She asked us if we thought certain actors looked like the real people in the roles they were portraying.

I also scalped some dance tickets last night with Caleb and Samantha. We made $30 a piece. So we ordered Papa Johns and made brownies and cheesey bread. It was nice to have non NY style pizza for the first time in months.

Ok that's about it. Bye!

The end is near.

2006-11-26T22:52:00.000-05:00

My Thanksgiving friends are all gone. Laura, Lauren and Chelsea all came up to join me in the likes of the parade, Serendipity, shopping, and Beauty and the Beast on Broadway. Somewhere in there, I assume it was the seven hours standing in the freezing cold rain during the parade, I got a little yucky feeling. It held off for a while, but Chelsea left this morning around 5AM and after walking her out to a cab and jogging back to my bed, I think it all hit me. I stayed up for a little bit since I felt so gross, and watched a movie until I fell back asleep. I finally "got up" (actually only woke up, I've probably left my bed for a total of five minutes) around 4. Made the mistake of eating granola bars, pie, and a cupcake...no hopes for a speedy recovery but it's all I had in the room and I had to eat something...

Anyway it's almost 11PM now and feels much earlier. I've got homework to do and a full week of work ahead. I haven't stayed in one city this long since high school. I love it, but I'm ready for home. I'm sick, I'm poor, I'm tired...it's just time to gain some energy back.

Still, I am thankful to be here. And so thankful for the week of non-stop laughing I just had. For that, I can handle a little cold.

I am falling.

2006-11-05T21:29:00.000-05:00

This is officially the fastest weekend of the semester. I don't know why it was just here, and now it's gone. Also, it was amazing. It consisted of friends, soul food in Harlem, cheap food in China Town, fireworks and fall in full swing. The NYC marathon was today so last night there were fireworks in Central Park and a jazz band was playing...and it felt like 1920.

I walked about 5 or 6 miles today, mostly because I couldn't take my eyes away from things like this:

The strange thing about it is that I kept taking these pictures thinking, "I always look at pictures like this and want so badly to be there." So I had to remind myself how blessed I am. And I had to stop looking through the lense every once in awhile and actually be there, right where I was.

Texas, how could you be so cruel as to deprive us of fall?

Theatrics

2006-11-04T01:05:00.000-05:00

I did this to my hair Sunday night:

I never thought the day would really come when I would have the guts to do it. It is really a few inches longer than this but due to the curlers I slept in it looks amazingly short. Maybe one day I will pay for someone else to cut my hair but I'm just so dang good at making myself look hot for free.

I am listening to recordings I did mostly in high school of songs I was writing on my computer and I don't understand why I couldn't keep the beat. The songs all start off slow and end in an amazinly rapid pace. It's strange to hear my voice when I was souped up with voice lessons. It may not have been better, but it was definitely more confident.

New York is still amazing for the most part. I saw "Wicked" and next Friday Bojangles invited me as his guest to opening night of the Christmas Spectacular, aka Radio City Rockettes at, where else, Radio City Music Hall. Sometime within the month I will see "Mary Poppins" and I am excited beyond belief. Hopefully will see a show with Chelsea over Thanksgiving.

I bought three books at Borders the other day (three for the price of two)! I have decided that buying books is a really great thing and I hope to accumulate a nice library over time.

I leave you with this:

Just another normal day in the city.

Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun duuun!

2006-10-29T12:51:00.000-05:00

Friday and Saturday night we went to Lincoln Center. Friday was Jazz at Lincoln Center and out seats were basically on the stage. There is a row of seats that circle the back of the stage and that's where we sat and it was awesome. Last night we saw the New York Philharmonic. Seriously? I could get addicted. They played four pieces, including the overture. The second half was Beethoven's Symphony No. 5 (you know, dun dun dun DUUUUN, dun dun dun DUUUUN...) and it was basically breath taking. One of the pieces they did was about 15 minutes long and there was all kinds of dissonance and unresolve...it was all legato, no punchiness about it at all. It was more modern, written in the 20th century. And to hear all of this amazing music by some of the most amazing musicians in the world made me feel very, very blessed. It took me back to All State Choir. Not only the life changing performances (and I can say that now with the benefit of hindsight), but those darn auditions. Sitting in a chair in the back of an auditorium praying they don't call my name immediately but getting increasingly frightened as the approached the third chair, second chair, first chair...Some of the best moments of my life right there. I miss having a reason to hold someone's hand that tight. I feel a strong need to be in a choir. I think it is definitely something I will seek out after I graduate.

Here is a picture of the fountain that the major theaters of Lincoln Center surround:

Welp, see ya later.

Nice.

2006-10-26T23:54:00.000-04:00

Remember the song that said “Live in New York but leave before it makes you hard. Live in LA but leave before it makes you soft.” I think that guy (the same guy that directed Romeo and Juliet and Moulin Rouge, actually) was telling the truth. I’ve realized that I am not always a nice person here. I believed in an assumption that no one was nice and I might as well not angry them by saying “hello” or even “excuse me” with an honest sound of apology in my voice. I saw a woman asking for change last night and I wanted to ignore her like I normally do. Then she saw a girl my age approaching her and she goes “Oh hi!” and the girl said in the most kind voice, “Hello. How was you’re day?” I heard her reply “Oh not so good,” as I was walking past.

A man just walked up to another man in Starbucks and played a few notes on his trumpet. Walking over I saw a man carrying two see-through bags full of human size doll heads. Honestly, where else?

...

I typed that up a few days ago. And I also changed my attitude a few days ago. I started smiling at people more. I have spoken more. I have been nice. I have not assumed that people do not like nice. I said "good morning" to a bored cashier at CVS and she smiled and we talked a little. I talked to people in elevators.

It's pretty simple, isn't it?

When doing nothing achieves everything...mmm.

2006-10-22T00:30:00.000-04:00

I'm into day three of my fall break. Let me tell you how wonderfully uneventful it has been. Besides hanging out with friends at night, I've been totally lazy, just reading and writing. I could punch myself for not writing a song in months. I did try, though. I wrote lyrics and attempted to use Garage Band...wasn't the same. I asked the Lord for one song over these four days and He was faithful:

I haven’t really been what I always hoped I would be
I haven’t exactly turned out
With what I’d hoped the world would see
When I really found my voice
Would I really make the choice to speak

I haven’t always tried like I always dreamed that I would
I believed in lies so much more than I should
When I finally found my legs
Would I really have the strength to tread

How many times have they said,
Do you really have to be here?
Do you really want to be here?
Isn’t there somewhere else?

I’m not leaving quiet
I’m not leaving quiet
I’m not leaving quiet

When I walk alone I can feel the wind in my face
When I look into her eyes I can feel the pain she’s embraced
Even when I’ve lost my dreaming
I know I have not lost my feeling yet

How many times have I cried,
Do I really have to be here?
Do I really want to be here?
Isn’t there some place else?

I cannot go quiet
I cannot go quiet
I cannot go quiet

It's not the whole thing, but there's most of it. I like having my guitar back. But I can't wait to play some Christmas music on my piano. I am already in a Christmas mind set and I guess it's because of the cold. It's lingering in the 50's and that's the weather I'm used to around Christmas time, maybe a little colder. So...when it gets even colder I'm afraid my brain will scatter and freak out because I won't be able to associate the cold with anything besides snowboarding and that is clearly not an option in this place.

I can't believe no one else freaked out about David Moscow besides Carly, cause I told her about it personally. Seriously, it's Davey! I need to own that movie and the soundtrack.

Well I have very important things to do. Bye.

"Open the gates and seize the day..."

2006-10-17T20:08:00.000-04:00

Remember this guy from "Big"...

and "Newsies (!!!!)...

Well now he looks like this:

David Moscow. My first celebrity sighting. Others may be let down but me, no. Not me. Those are two amazing movies that he was in. Recently he was in "Honey" but does that really matter?

A wonderful thing that happened today is that an assignment originally due tomorrow is now due next week. Yes!

A really wonderful thing that is happening right now is that I am sitting in class...in a cloud. That's right. Class in a cloud. There is nothing to see but fog from the windows in the Empire State Building. Also, we're watching BBC documentaries about really wonderful music, including Rosemary Clooney and Jackson 5. I have recently gone from a fan to a big fan of Rosemary. I bought an album of hers from ebay for $4 and it is so, so good. I'm not even upset that I've been walking in the rain today without an umbrella when I have three at home.

I had the best time when my family was here. Lauren got to turn 18 here. We did so many things and I have not been that tired since the end of the half marathon I think. I love you, family!

It's too bad I have been so busy lately because there are a handful of anecdotes I probably would have shared, but now can't remember.

Basically, I still love it here and...bye!

I am tired.

2006-10-16T23:18:00.000-04:00

I am tired. Right now tired in the sense that I want to sleep. I'm not sleeping, though, because I'm doing some homework. Um, way to get us used to no homework or tests or assignments ever, Belmont East. Thanks for that. I am actually tired in a bigger sense, though. I haven't had a slow day in a few weeks and I am very thankful for that because I love the reasons I was busy, but I can't escape the fact that I can't run on fumes. I haven't yet figured out how to focus without having "alone time". That's dumb. I wish I could gather energy from all you people. Now back to work so I can eventually rest and become interesting again.

Snapshots.

2006-10-01T23:17:00.000-04:00

Today I got up to go to church but the church had moved. So I just walked around the East Side a little cause I hadn't spent much time there. I got a bran muffin and some "immune builder" orange juice at a cafe, then briefly walked to Tiffany, Bloomingdales, FAO Shwartz, Disney Store (I didn't know it was over there! YES!), Apple Store, Trump Tower, and Serendipity. Just really scoping for when family is here. We will definitely go back over there. Almost every day now I've had some of this:

Yeah! I got blackberries! I have realized that it really is not too hard to eat healthy. This is from a market two minutes away. The reason it was hard to eat tons of fruit and vegetables in Nashville was because I couldn't keep them or I'd run out too soon. Now, I can just walk to the market everyday and get more. Ta da, dinner. And it is all fresh and organic and tastes really good. Not like Wal Mart or (sorry about this) Target produce.

Saturday I went to Brooklyn with Caleb and Samantha. There was a war protest going on. They were also shouting things like, "Black pride!" but none of them were black. I guess that's fine? I found a Rosemary Clooney CD I really wanted at a small record store, but I decided to wait. So much music to buy...

The marvelous Brooklyn Bridge. There is nothing like walking across this thing. I didn't even notice the flag was up there when I took this picture. Can you believe Meg Ryan jumped off this bridge for Hugh Jackman?!

So starts the week. My eyes are droopy. I'm ready for the next days to fly by. I can't wait to see my family see New York!

I dare you to read this scary looking thing.

2006-09-28T23:40:00.000-04:00

Today I was a real New Yorker. I literally ran all over the city and I yelled at somebody. I also wore a black dress and heals. And ate some pizza. Let me fill you in a little:

I was 10 minutes late to work because I could not fit my body on a train. Interning was fun and I am liking it more each day. Lots of good things. On lunch, I realized I had 4 missed calls, two messages, and maybe some text messages (add this to an email and some IM's when I got back from lunch). It looked like most of the calls were from Samantha so I called her before I listened to anything, hoping to save time if I needed to. Basically I was needed to work an event that I said I would work but then they didn't need me. But Jes was extremely sick and they seemed desperate. The event was black tie and I had nothing of the sort. So I ran down the street and bought one of the first black dresses I saw, in case I was able to get off interning early. I knew there would be no time to pick up something later. And I was right. I left at 3:00 and walked very quickly to the subway. I had to go home and be back at this place by 4:30, so I was in a hurry. Second time today I had to rush through the streets of NY hoping not to be late. I hate that. Well, I get to the train in good timing and am standing in front of the door, waiting for it to open when instead, it starts moving again. Leaves us. WHAT? Then an announcement comes on. None of the trains I need are stopping at that station. I didn't even think. I ran back upstairs and made my way seven streets up to the next stop. Well, apparently everyone wanted to be on that street at the same time. I was hustling like crazy, completey stressed out and upset. If I accidentally hit someone while I weaved my way around, I muttered, "excuse me". Well, for one woman, that wasn't good enough. I flew by her and she starts muttering "That's right just run in to me blah blah blah I am a cruel, heartless person..." Well, I just was tired of it. I am not walking like this for the fun of it. So, I stopped in my tracks, turned around, took a good stance and said, "EXCUSE. ME." Boy, I told her. So I kept walking, made some more people mad, but I got to the train. Seemed like I waited forever. I busted it to my room when I got off and dropped my bed on my back at 3:51. Twenty minutes behind schedule. But it's okay, I can get ready for black tie in ten minutes, right? Yes, I absolutely can. I got back on that train and got off at 4:26. Called Samantha for walking directions just as my phone was dying from all the stress it's had today. It was such a relief to see the people I was meeting, despite the sweat and painful feet I was enduring. We had some time to rest before we went to Battery Park and held up signs, directing lawyers where to go to get on the ferry to Ellis Island. I had a run in with a charicateur artist. He would not leave me alone, but I got rid of him. Because I am a smart city girl. Hm. The lawyers were nice and it was nice to make eye contact and smile and even talk to people. That does not happen here unless you want to get suckered into buying sunglasses and/or robbed. Eventually, though, I began to freeze, as we were by the water and my dress was not warm. Also, my feet! Get me some slippers and sweat pants, please. Samantha and I left eventually and went to Times Square, had some pizza, and met Caleb at the Starbucks he works at. He had more pizza from a meeting he was at. I got some free hot chocolate, and we got samples of new Starbucks breakfast sandwhiches. Then Samantha and I went to the subway and Caleb biked home. Well, after chatting with a nice theater student, we discovered we were going downtown and we needed to go uptown. How did that happen? We were just so tired, I think. Didn't even notice. Thankfully, we hadn't gotten on the train yet, so we walked around to the uptown train, only to find our cards had been swiped too recently and wouldn't let us in. We watched the train come and go, and we could do nothing about it. Seriously, public transporation was not good to me today. By the time the next train came around our cards were working again, so it was back on the freezing cold train. But now, I am in my bed wearing my pj's and I am so tired that I am considering not even checking my spelling. Huge, I know.

So there it is. In one, huge, not-very-appealing-to-the-eye paragraph. Congrats if you read it all and you are not my mom. I am going to read some Job and possibly some Screwtape, but I may be fast asleep by then. Can't wait.

Cotton candy is a fruit by association.

2006-09-27T23:19:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm starting to feel the pressure. I am going to need some fruits and vegetables and some whole wheats and skim milks to enter my system. And can I please just go for a run? Now here's the thing, I eat at least one of those things once a day but I just cannot seem to get a balanced diet. Not on a budget of money and time. And I know that I could go run at 7 AM and that I should. That would work if I went to bed right after my 12-hour-long days. But I can't do that, because I have to blog. Just kidding. I have stuff to do...wind down, read, sit and not think. Or sit AND think if I haven't been particularly thoughtful that day. I am physically feeling this pressure, though. I'm not gaining weight, but I'm losing muscle and it just feels funny. I've been really good about fruit lately, but I gotta work on the veggies. I am re-arranging my time and money budget. Today I did not go to Starbucks. It was WEIRD! I can handle it, though. There is energy in other foods.

I would now like to end this part of this blog because I will not get sucked into the sickly skinny calorie counter's New York world. Seriously, fashion week felt a little like the Holocaust.

Here is what I did last night:

Reaquanted with A Rod. Told him to go back to the Rangers. I also ate a hot dog and some cotton candy. Sometimes, you have to do that. When you are at your first Yankee game is one of those times.

I bought a drawing pad and some colored pencils. So far nothing brilliant, but it's coming. I've also been "writing" with Garage Band. It's hard to write on a computer program, but a little fun. As with the drawing, nothing brilliant, but oh it will come. Some day. I believe it's been promised! When the good stuff comes I will fill you in on my creative pursuits. It feels good to get back to me.

I have to end this because Laura is telling me about new boyfriend and I am making her come see me. It's important!

I heart NY. I heart JL.

2006-09-22T20:05:00.000-04:00

It's Friday! I am staying in. I cleaned and put on my pj's, ate a corn dog and some strawberry applesauce. I put together one of my favorite recipes and got a strawberry pastry in the oven. I am listening to Jonny Lang's new album on AOL. This man is singing for Jesus! Love it. Everyone HAS TO BUY THIS ALBUM. It is all good, but "Only a Man" is the most amazing raw, outcry to the Lord I've ever heard any artist, Christian or not, make. More good news...Grey's Anatomy is finally being sold on itunes. Yessss. I am about to watch last season's finale and the premiere that I missed last night. Sounds like a great Friday to me, sorry it's not more exciting.

On the home front, however, things are way more exciting. Homecoming game! Pep rally! Lauren didn't win but all this stuff she got to do just sounds so fun. I want to beeee there. My underarms smell!

On to the weekend!

Today, I am lame.

2006-09-19T21:27:00.000-04:00

Hey. It's only 9:20 and I'm ready for bed. I can do most things New Yorkers can, but I can't do the late stuff. They eat lunch anywhere from 1:30 to 4:00 and dinner after 8:00. Sometimes I ate lunch at 11:15 in Nashville. The "old men" in Maddox went to dinner at 4:30. And the late night stuff doesn't happen until around midnight. I'm just so tired this week. And my eye keeps acting up. For a few weeks now, every once in a while my left eye goes crazy and turns red, is always wattery and creating "sleep". Gross, huh? I think it's because I recycle cheap contact solution. Again, gross. But it's killing me right now. Throbbing and stuff. I'm tired.

Last night I got to video chat with Judi and Erin in Nashville. Lauren called and I put her on speaker phone and we connected, tri-state. Pretty amazing. The video chat was so neat! I hadn't used it before. They also got to talk to BJ and Jes here in NY, so everyone was excited. All you people out there, get a MacBook and join the fun.

Today the Victoria Secret models were doing an in-store. This includes Heidi Klum, Gissele (spelling, who cares), and the one Laura says I look like. I didn't get a chance to see them, even though I work and go to school right by them. Would have been cool, though. I just wanted to say, "auf wiedershen". And yes, I did just look up how to spell that.

I've been watching free pilot episodes online of fall season TV. "Jericho" looks intense. I watched half of two boring sitcoms and quit. Right now I'm watching "Heroes". I'm not a TV fanatic, I think maybe that project made me want to watch. I am just in constant need of good stories. That's a whole other conversation, though.

I overdrew my account. Seriously! I didn't have enough cash on me to pay for a perscription. Mom said dad would put the money in Friday and they would pay for it. That became Sunday, Monday. Well, I had to buy it Monday, so I thought I'd have money by then. I overdrew $10. I forgot to turn in my timesheet last week, so I didn't get paid Monday. It'll just double up next week, which will be nice. I won't be eating out all week. That is strange, but I got a dozen eggs I need to eat, so it works out. College in New York City is just what you think it is.

Well, looks like rain this weekend. Darn.

Good day, good night.

2006-09-17T23:19:00.000-04:00

Wow. I just got an intense craving for cheddar bay biscuits from Red Lobster. I don't know what to do about this; there is, in fact, nothing I can do. Man.

Well I thought I was going to church this evening, but Samantha called this morning and said, "Hey, are you going to Forefront?" which is the church I wanted to go to last week, she happened to want to check it out, too. Caleb was working. So I got up and ran out the door, practically. No time for shower. I got there 15 minutes late. Not bad, but missed worship. Everything else was pretty good, I guess. The sermon was a little simple, maybe, but sometimes I need simple. It was good stuff for me to hear at this moment. I've been very convicted lately about things in my life or perhaps the way I am living my life and thinking day-to-day. It's all stuff that sort of snuck up on me, I didn't realize it was bringing me down. And it's all simple things you'd think I would know but now I'm seeing them in new light. I am sad to say it will take time and persistence to effectively change these things and I am constantly having to tell myself "stop" with every other thought. If you will, I would appreciate prayers in the direction of...knowing exactly when I am being tested and having the strength to get through the big and small battles. This is more of a "shaping my character" struggle than "Oh Lord, this girl shouldn't be left by herself" struggle.

And yes, moving on. After church we went, where else, to a bar. I mean come on, y'all know me, that shouldn't be a surprise. There was a great sports bar in Times Square but the game Caleb wanted to watch wasn't on. So we went to one closer to where I live and watched all kindsa football and ate everything fried. Giants fans are loud. I walked out of there with throbbing ears.

Then I came back home and put on shorts and a t-shirt and TENNIS SHOES. Love those. Took a book and walked to Central Park. Before that I walked down 96th to check out where family might stay. I cannot figure out Central Park. It is such a maze, and I had a map. Somehow I ended up at the gates of the Garden Conservatory...right as they were closing. Nice. That's when I called Lauren but the girl ignores me. I swear, after all I do. So called mom to hear about Lauren's homecoming court dress. She will be beautiful....I WANT TO BE THERE. I'm growling right now because I am mad. So I just walked around and talked to mom, then came back and read a little for school. A book called "So You Wanna Be a Rock 'N' Roll Star" written by the drummer of Semisonic. It's good! I like it. How's that for a text book title? To think, sometimes I doubt that my life is wonderful.

Well it's a new week. I'm hoping to go for a walk/run in the morning, but I'm up later than I thought I'd be. We'll see. I'm excited a little for this week because something fun might happen Tuesday, and I'll tell you if it does. In fact, I will also show you, if it does. Ok. Bye!

The things I was going to do and the things I actually did do.

2006-09-17T02:16:00.000-04:00

It's 2:15 AM. I'm not extremely tired, but this is bad news for Monday. I'll be tired Monday. But as for today...

I woke up and showered and asked more people to join my group for Lauren's homecoming stuff. I think we're up to 19 members now, including Brandon. I planned to go Target, the library, maybe read, maybe Apple store, and maybe FAO Shwartz. Well, I got a knock on my door and it was a friend named Amie. She wanted to go to Coney Island but, ended up going with me to Target. On the way there, there was a street fair! It was great; we bought pashminas for $5. Then we went to Target. New, bigger, closer Target in the Bronx. I spent $40 on food and John Mayer CD. No Chris Thile CD in a Target where half of the selection is Lation music. Ah, well. I got back around 5:00, too late for the library, so I cleaned and listened to music. I was going to watch a movie with Samantha and Caleb and friend, Shannon, from WI who lives here. I was going to cook dinner. But instead, I ended up going to a restaurant called S'mac with about seven Belmont people. All they serve is mac and cheese...I got four cheese with spinach and garlic. Then we went to a winebar called Winebar in a sweet part of the city. I tried learning a little about wine and ended up getting a glass of torte de tora maybe? I don't know, something medium and red. Mom and dad would have liked it. Afterwards we got on the train that was running backwards because of construction and accidentally went to Brooklyn. Thing is, the train was so packed, we all got on separate cars. My car happened to be absolutely crazy and innappropriate. I'll tell you about it if you ask. Thankfully, we were all smart enough to get off and find each other and say "WE ARE IN BROOKLYN. Wups." We got back eventually, and I put some cookie dough in the oven. I actually dropped the cookies in the oven, but that was alright. Best way to end the day, I think.

I just wish my weekends were longer because I like them. I am determined to use every weekend up since all of my other time is spent working. I suppose it's a good way to "ration" the city but, this city just needs no rationing.

Anyway I'm going to get ready for bed. Peace, y'all.

Royal!

2006-09-16T00:19:00.000-04:00

See if you can imagine this:

I was sitting in the subway waiting for the next train, sort of zoning out, thinking about God and how I wish I could be consistently good. There were two trains going by in front of me, incredibly loud and frantic, then as soon as they passed it was silent, despite the many people waiting around me. Then almost immediately a horn began playing, very slowly, "Amazing Grace". And then, my world just stopped. The man playing was two tracks over from me and hidden by a pillar. I saw the end of the rusted silver horn he was playing on, but didn't recognize the instrument. I just sat there, looking at nothing, wanting to cry, but I'm fine with the fact that I couldn't. It was beautiful and everything was perfect. The next train didn't fly by until the last note finished. I happened to see the man for just a second after he finished. He threw his head back, he was Asian...I wondered if he loved Jesus, and I hoped he did. Then I wondered if he knew how Jesus had used him, despite this man's love or lack-thereof, to reach out to me. I think that's good stuff.

My supervisor brought me up in a meeting today. I jumped and got nervous when she said my name, but she told everyone about my TV project and how it was really good. Everyone seemed impressed and I was happy!

LAUREN IS ON HOMECOMING COURT! Awwww yeah. My sister, the queen. I would rather be home for that than almost any major holiday. If you want to support her, you can join my facebook group =)

Our class saw Kate Taylor, James' sister, in concert tonight. She was very nice and played some pretty good music. And she's related to music royalty, so that's cool.

Still, the rain sort of put a lull in the day. I've decided if I ever know anyone that's moving to New York and I can afford it, I am buying them the most expensive (if it's the best) umbrella I can find so it won't pop inside out or tear, some rain boots, and a rain coat. That's all you need, really.

Tomorrow this city is mine....rain or shine.

Dance like no ones watching...even when they are.

2006-09-14T23:36:00.000-04:00

Today was sort of the same as yesterday, only I didn't take lunch. I ate one of the Starbucks sandwhiches while I worked hard to finish the TV project. Class was boring again because we talked about artist/management contracts. Top it off, it was rainy and dreary. I didn't take a shower and I wore tennis shoes. But a few good things did happen. We got out of class early. I started a group on facebook called LAUREN WHITE FOR HOMECOMING QUEEN and invited a bunch of people I didn't know. She might not even be in court, but at least it's funny. I'm talking to her right now and she is reading this right now...hi Lauren.

And a great thing happened. In the subway coming back from class, there was a great blues band playing and a pretty large crowd of people watching. There was what I would call a "dance floor" in front of the band. It was actually a huge space in between the band and the c-shaped crowd. Right. A dancefloor. Had I thought for a second, the next thing would not have happened. Thankfully, I did not think, only jumped in front of the crowd and started dancing. By myself. Someone took a picture of me. After that BJ said he was thinking that he was happy he knew that girl. As it is, I'm happy I know that girl, too.

This is what happened today.

2006-09-13T22:27:00.001-04:00

I hate to say that my day wasn't an exciting or unordinary day. I made chocolate chip pancakes this morning and got on a refreshingly not-so-jam-packed subway to internship. I got right to work on my TV project which really made the time go by. Then my computer crashed right before lunch. I decided to deal with it after, so I ate my PBJ and walked to Bank of America at the Empire State Building about 4.5 minutes away. Then I got a white hot chocolate and read a little at Starbucks. Then back to work. Called tech support and got the computer fixed. I ended the day watching promotional videos for the show "Heroes"...the bad thing about this project is I want to watch TV now but I don't have one and if I did, class prohibits that. Maybe it's a good thing. Someone watch Heroes and tell me if it's good! So after interning, I walked around trying to decide what to have for dinner while talking to mom on the phone (hey mom). I then ran into Caleb and Samantha at the exact street corner I ran into another Belmont kid at the other day...while I was on the phone with mom. Weird? Turns out Caleb had three chicken salad sandwhiches for me from Starbucks. Yes! So I just bought a peach and a banana on the street for 85 cents. Then up to floor 63 in the ESB for class. Boring! All the other ones are good, but not this one.

That all said, today felt pretty boring to me. Um...I think I need to re-evaluate.

I slyly took this picture on the way home. That's why it's crooked and cropped and black and white; I couldn't get a good picture without them knowing I was taking it. The boy kept trying to read the paper and so his dad would lean in so he could "read". I couldn't stop starring! I know, I'm a creep.

The leaves, they are(n't) a changin.

2006-09-12T23:10:00.000-04:00

Tuesday!

School 9-12:15; Internship 1-6; School 7-9:30. I decided I really wanted to buy Chris Thile and John Mayer's albums today after a listen on itunes. I found the nearest Borders, about a 15 minute walk from my internship, expecting to pay the online prices, total amount $23...not bad. It would have cost $32 in the store! I bought a nice dinner of really amazing fresh fruit and a brownie instead.

I got accused of being the type of person who goes for the albums that only ship one copy to the store when its released (Chris Thile, they couldn't find it) instead of the album that comes by the truck loads. That's who the sales clerk thought I was. But I'm not really...she didn't know I wanted to buy John Mayer, too. I'm sure that would have lowered my cool music snob factor.

I have a fun new project at Cherry Lane! I'm making a schedule of the fall lineup for all the TV stations. It will require me to watch promos and do research on the shows, then write out descriptions and ideas for the type of music we should pitch to them. I'm excited; I'll be working on it the next two days and it will give me some good practice, let me be creative to an extent, and get me in a habit of making music sonomous with other media. My only worry so far is that I think I might want to be a part of the creative process before the music is actually done. And also possibly go on tour or something. I just don't know...

The more I hear bad writers, and the more I hear good ones, the more I just want to write all the time.

We had a great speaker tonight in record company operations. He manages all the big acts that are signed with Cherry Lane; Black Eyed Peas, Will.i.am, Fergie, John Legend. He also managed Meatloaf and The Fugees. Pretty sweet! His job sounds super stressful but so fun. He was refreshing because he is interested in real talent, not the money makers. Think about it...Meatloaf? He takes risks, it's nice.

It was almost cold today. That's fine, as long as the leaves are changing, but they aren't yet. Looks like 80's for the weekend, though...I'll be in Central Park.

The will to walk.

2006-09-11T21:41:00.000-04:00

It's 9/11 in NYC. We saw two lights shooting up where the towers stood tonight. Other than that, everything felt fairly normal.

I have started loving this city. It has so many different faces, and the last few days I've seen its good side. There certainly are sad situations, and I think I let those slowly suck my little portion of joy dry at first. I say little portion because, in relation to the joys filling heaven, my incredibly huge, brimming so much over the top and sides that it is physically visible when it is at its highest point amount of joy must really be so small. Perhaps there is a joy bank. And perhaps I actually do have access to every vault...imagine if we took advantage of every vault! I bet there is so much joy that goes to waste...Anyway, today I was joyful, and it made the city beautiful!

The Screwtape Letters is a book by C.S. Lewis that I am reading. In it Screwtape is a demon sending letters to his demon nephew, Wormwood, who is learning how to decieve his assigned newly-converted man. Everything is backwards; Jesus is "the Enemy"; joy is bad. I was reading today on my lunch break in Starbucks, in between text messaging Joey about his allegergies. He's really gross, by the way. Here's the best thing I read today:

"He (Jesus) cannot 'tempt' to virtue as we do to vice. He wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really there He is please even with their stumbles. Do not be deveived, Wormwood. Our cause is never more in danger that when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys."

Tonight Sam and I went to Sip for dinner. It is a tiny coffee shop/bar/cafe with free wireless and half off food on Mondays. I had a ham, pesto, mozzerella, and sun dried tomato sandwhich on some really good wheat bread with a cucumber salad on the side. I also ordered some very amazing potatoes. All for $4.50! Sweet! Will definitely be going back.

Tomorrow three new things will be in stores: John Mayer CD, Chris Thile CD, Grey's Anatomy Season 2. Sounds like a good day for the wealthy.

And how could I have forgotten! I charged my ipod today at work. Music makes all the difference. I think I'm on the verge of a writing spree, even though I am void of all instruments. I'm creative though, right? I'll think of something...

I took a picture of a Duke Ellington statue today, but it was dark and didn't turn out. So here, my only photo from ground zero. I can't really look at it, but maybe you can.

Blogging, gardens, and cool churches.

2006-09-10T22:31:00.000-04:00

I have never been a "blogger," partly because the word "blogger" is a turn off, and partly because I am not inclined to share my intelligent and/or stupid thoughts with an internet community. But this will be different! This will be an exciting account of my time in New York, mostly for my parents no doubt, and I won't be discussing my love for the color black. Also, I won't be making stereotypes.

Anyway, you may already know that I spent my Sunday in the Garden Observatory of Central Park. I slept through any hopes of going to church, I am sad to say. I stayed up too late last night trying to find a church to go to today. Anything that looked promising also looked like they were trying to be super hip, and I don't really need that. Although, the church I did ultimately decide to visit today (had I visited) lured me in with their free bagels and coffee. Is it bad the the thought of free food is more appealing to me than the thought of a "cool" church? I don't think so, actually.

Well, tomorrow starts my third week at Cherry Lane Music. Perhaps it will be extremely exciting. Let's hope so!